Assassin Lineage
by Bakuretsu-Shio
Summary: Killua can't help but feel his true calling is trying to deter him from keeping his own individuality. Could Illumi's lingering words hold truth in them? Is he really nothing but a killing machine?
1. Rainy Night

How long has it been since it started raining?

The night sky was beautifully illuminated by the moons whole, long before they had slept. Yet now all he could see was the thickness of black clouds covering all that sought that cold yet comforting light during such hours. Rain sprinkled down from the heavens, pit pattering on the glass of the closed hotel windows. The heavy dabbling of water did not support his wishes to sleep, and so he watched on with an almost emotionless gaze of ocean blue.

Slowly, the former assassin's attention turned to that of his sleeping companion, happily snoozing away through the hours with nothing worrisome on his mind to keep him up just like his friend was. He envied Gon and his ability to so easily accomplish such feats without an ounce of trouble. Beside the black haired Hunter, Killua sighed without any sound and turned his head once more to the beating on the window that echoed through the entirety of their hotel room. He didn't bother to watch the time and how long he had been sitting there, watching everything pass by as if he were only there to observe. It had been approximately 32 hours since the last time Killua let his head hit a pillow and fall into a deep unconscious state of sleep, so what was stopping him now from feeling such luxuries?

Absolutely nothing, but at the same time everything.

It had dawned upon him that day just how impatiently tense he appeared to be getting by the approaching hour. Without so much as a word to his friend however, he kept this knowledge to himself in hopes he could deal with his own problems in silence; within the shadows where no one would think twice to look. Gon didn't need to worry about him. All he needed to focus on was finding his father he had started his journey for, with Killua by his side supporting him along the way.

A sudden flash of lightning and roar of thunder threw the young boy from his thoughts and he jolted on the bed he sat on, eyes wide as he had momentarily dropped his almost invincible guard. Is he so out of it that the weather is frightening him now?

"Get it together, idiot." Killua mumbled under his breath in a barely audible tone.

As he turned his head, the young assassin found himself with natural brown irises in front of him, staring as if asking what on earth he was doing awake while looking so shaken up on the spot. Gon didn't even need to open his mouth to speak before Killua did.

"Ah- The thunder was so loud it woke me."

"…Really?" Gon blinked with a straight face before sitting up and moving the blankets off his warm shoulders.

They both knew that lying wasn't considered something a friend should do, only in cases they needed to, but in Killua's case he had no choice. With a shrug and short scoff of laughter, he reached out with his index finger and lightly poked Gon's nose teasingly for him to lie back down and sleep. For now he simply had to play it cool, pretend nothing was wrong, and hope that these complications were but a pointless problem dwelling in his mind.

"I'm fine, really. So let's go back to sleep."

When both boys had comfortably relaxed into the cushioning of the bed, Killua restricted himself from closing his heavy lids. He had gone longer than this time without sleep before, so this would be no different. Gon had already managed to let leep claim him, softly breathing in and out in a calming rhythm that made Killua almost tempted to close his eyes and feel slumbers warm embrace around his body and straining subconscious. The longer he waited for the sun to rise, eternity passed and he found the rain become increasingly… agitating. Most found such sounds reassuring and by no doubt did he as well, but at this time it seemed to do just the opposite effect of its supposed intention.

Five minutes… Fifteen minutes… Half an hour… The Zoldyck son grit his teeth, eyes wide and twitching in seething anger until he couldn't help but sit up and silently move off the bed he and Gon occupied.

"Darn it, I can't handle this!" He tried to keep it barely above a whisper.

Letting out an impatient huff, Killua treaded to the bathroom, switching on the light and closing the door behind him. He didn't bother with the lock because it wasn't necessary. He turned on the tap, making sure the water was cold and cupped his hands below the surface, splashing his face whilst watching the stray droplets fall from his snow white hair. Exhaling, and taking in a new breath, Killua exited the bathroom and re-entered the bedroom to find Gon where he had left him, still soundlessly asleep.

Honestly, he envied that guy. He may have been the same age as him, he may have been fundamentally weaker than the assassin but his heart, his determination was the strongest thing out there that he had ever seen. Through thick and thin, Gon could still sleep like a child in the dead of the night like he was a normal human being. Not a professional hunter, not a nen-user, but a normal boy who had yet to feel the weight of burdens and lives disheartening matters. While Killua held so much on his shoulders he wouldn't share it with anyone else. He didn't have that same spark Gon held… but maybe that was for better or worse.

Snickering, the white haired boy shook his head. "If Gon knew what I was thinking he'd probably call me out for that thought."

Slipping back into bed, he decided to put at the very least half an hour into sleeping. However once that time was up he'd be back where he started in the night. Waiting for the rain to stop…

Actually… when did it start?

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**I'm just getting started on this! **

**However, I'd like to know what you think about this so far...**


	2. Small Stone

**Thank you for the review!**

**This story has an unpredictable ending, and because of that I've yet to figure out how many chapters will be made. It's likely to have less than 8 chapters, but this remains undecided for the most part.**

**I sincerely hope you enjoy what I have in store for these young Hunters…**

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"Killua!" Gon called out to his friend, waving his arm to gain his attention from across the path, "Take a look at this!" His voice seethed with enthusiastic cheerfulness, vibrant among the many crowds about in the markets, bartering and trading what treasures they had.

The young Transmuter hummed as he turned to Gon, walking over with his hands casually sitting in his pockets with a bored exterior appearance. As he came over, they looked at the various items a man had been selling, trinkets and valuables for travellers who were usually on journeys around the world. While examining what he had for sale, something caught Killua's eye and he picked up a small gem that shone brightly as the sun's rays hit it. Its colours changed into that of a rainbow, peculiar indeed. He couldn't put his finger on it, but there was something different about this item compared to the other ones on sale. Suddenly, he used _Gyo, _a mount of aura covering his eyes as he found the gem within his grasp covered in _Nen_.

"Hey old man, where did you get this?" Killua asked while looking further into its features. The salesman smiled all the while ignoring the small insult to his age in the boy's words.

"It was found in the Numere Wetlands." He answered, looking at Gon who was more entertained by a small cat-shaped object with a paw that motioned up and down. It was red in colour with a feline expression skilfully painted onto its head, with three equal stripes leading from its forehead to the back of its tail. "Actually, the mercenary I hired found that. He said only a licensed Hunter would find a profit from it." The middle aged man snickered at the memory of the find, since he didn't understand why but thought it could get him some well-earned money from it at the time.

"I see..." Killua murmured, about to put it down before the man's smile extended cheek to cheek.

"Keep it, lad. You're actually the first to take interest in it."

The Hunter blinked in confusion, seeing him wave it away like he didn't need any money from him. At the time he found it he thought it would be interesting to sell, but that was quite a long time ago. By this time he simply wanted to rid of it, but without throwing it away like trash. So with a short thank you from the silver haired boy, he and Gon left the merchant on his own, surprisingly satisfied despite selling it for nothing. What a sentimental guy he was…

"What did you get?" Gon asked with a hint of curiosity, leaning in and taking a look as Killua held out the small gem in his hand no bigger than the tip of his thumb. "Wow… It's pretty!" He smiled to his friend with two beaming brown eyes.

The initial colour of the stone was sky blue, similar to the assassin's eyes yet only lighter in tone. It was quite stunning overall, so what could the Nen surrounding it be for? Perhaps nothing, and Killua chose not to dwell on that question. This sort of gem could easily be made into a necklace for good luck or something simple like that, since its worth wasn't all that invigorating in the first place. Yet it appeared to impress Gon, but nearly everything did in their travels unfortunately. Someone so simple minded like that was naive.

It had already reached midday by the time they finished journeying through the markets in that part of the city. Clouds hung over in a sheet of darkened grey and threatened to cover the city in a raining shadow of gloom, as citizens sought cover from the incoming downpour. The two young boys weren't quite done for the day however, and found a relaxing café to settle down for the time being while the rain passed, or for the majority of it. It wasn't overflowing with the town's residents, but it wasn't too isolated either from the people. The smell of tea filled the air around them, calming their nerves while the sky outside only grew in obscurity.

By the time their food arrived, the two had decided upon their next plan of action for where they'd be travelling and doing. They'd stay in this selected place for the month which was already half way through, then move along to Yorknew City to meet up with Leorio to see how he was doing. Kurapica was far too busy at the time to meet with them, but they understood the circumstances for the job he was taking on.

"Hey Killua," Gon suddenly spoke up, "Are you afraid of lightning?"

Killua stopped sipping from his orange drink, raising a brow towards his spiky haired friend. Where had that question sudden risen from? He certainly wasn't afraid of a little lightning, especially since he dealt with electricity through his younger years.

"Where the heck did that come from?" He replied.

"Eh…well last night you said the thunder woke you up. So I just thought you might be scared of it."

"Idiot! I'm not scared of a little thunder! I-It just surprised me is all!" Killua looked away with a pout, eyes begrudging at the memory recalled. Beforehand he was already awake, so it had simply caught him off guard because of his mind waving on other matters.

Sighing, the Zoldyck son crossed his arms and ignored the rest of what Gon had to say, trying to be as stubborn as possible on that topic previously brought up. Gon eventually had no choice but to give up and move on. As he did, he finished up his meal and noticed sprinkles of rain delicately hitting the large window beside their booth. How fast the sunny weather had changed yesterday to that of an overcast atmosphere. It didn't bother Gon, but he much preferred the sunlight on his skin than the dampness of rain chilling him to the bone as it did.

Across from him Killua quietly sank into his thoughts once again, and now that he had settled down, he noticed his eyes were quite heavy. No doubt due to his lack of sleep, but it could become troublesome if Gon were to notice the signs of his exhaustion over the days. His hand ran over the table in front of him, fingers adroitly tapping one at a time in boredom. His eyes lightened compared to the rains dimmer glow, ocean blue to darkened azure skies. A brief sigh escaped his lips, and he had completely forgotten all around him, including Gon who sat silently while watching the assassin's exterior stiffen.

The silver haired boy closed his eyes, "I'm gonna go for a walk."

"Oh? I'll-" Gon was immediately interrupted when Killua turned his head to him, eyes pleading for him to be alone for the time he would be on his own. Gon didn't know what to make of it, but he trusted his friend, and nodded with a half-hearted smile. "Okay. I'll see you back at the hotel?"

Earning a nod with a small fist bump between the two, Killua left the café, and despite the rain heavily falling, he ignored it and made his way across the street. It didn't bother him in the least; in fact… _it couldn't have had more perfect timing._ Drenched to the bone, Killua continued along the path, heading nowhere in particular, but far away from Gon. He felt he needed to be away, like something had drawn him in the direction opposite to Gon for a purpose unknown to him.

But what was this uneasy feeling lurking inside him?

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**This chapter doesn't hold many twists, but this is a story that builds up to the plot. ;)**

**If you'd like to review, feel free to!**


	3. The Magician

**This is my first HxH fanfic, so if some characters are OOC, then I apologize ahead of reading.**

** However I have tried to keep them in-character and describe their natural behaviour to the best of my abilities. :)**

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Had these delusions accumulated from his mind? It sprouted from the memory of his sibling Illumi showing up at the Hunter Exams, and from then on it slowly ate at his conscience, corrupting his untouched purities that still lay deep inside his brain. It burnt his hope with an eternal flame, and he could do nothing against it but silently wish for its horrors to end. That is where it started, and where it continues until now. It hurt, and it felt as if Illumi's words were coming to light. His mind couldn't handle the strain of change, of ignoring his already foretold fate.

Killua bit at his lip harshly, an unsettling feeling of impatience filling him. It felt similar to the night before, and his increasingly agitated mind made it worse. The pits of his stomach coiled and made his hair stand up, muscles randomly tensing in his arms screaming out for longed attention; to feel blood dripping down as his victim lie dying on the ground with barely a heartbeat to go on with.

No, he wouldn't allow himself to kill anyone, not unless it was absolutely necessary. That's how he had changed, and he wouldn't let it all be for nothing now. It was because of Gon… because of him he wanted to come out of the shadows and live in the light like him. Nothing would bring him back to that life he led back then. So he had to hold on until the feelings passed, and then he could walk without hesitance along his own path. He had to hold onto those urges, calm down, collect his thoughts and-

"Oi, kid."

Killua stopped in his tracks instantly, head hung low with his hands in his pockets. Shadows covered his eyes from his bangs, a hollow expression plastered on his face as he waited what this stranger had to say.

A brawled muscle man stood before the boy, wearing a grey hoodie to cover his upper body, the hood standing on his head, and lanky black trousers with sneakers on his feet. His face had been scarred, perhaps by the rough life he had chosen to live and his eyes screamed trouble. It was just a useless hoodlum with nothing better to do with his time honestly, and Killua didn't want to deal with someone so stupid. However the other had plans different to his, swiftly holding a sharp pocket knife up to the boy's neck in a threatening attempt.

"Hand over all yer shit and I _might_ let ya live…brat." A smug smile spread across his lips as the knife slowly inched towards Killua's neck.

"You're annoying…" The Hunter breathed out calmly.

The boy watched the blade closely, unfazed by his threat and unhurriedly took his hand out of his pocket, faded veins revealing across his pale skin. In that instant, the blade of the knife broke off and a loud clang echoed from where it hit the ground, leaving the man confused in the moment it occurred. But before he had time to switch his focus to the boy, sharp nails plunged deep into the flesh of his chest. Killua vanished from his sight as he had fallen to the ground, body twitching erratically to understand the timeline in the last minute, trying to grasp the loss of a certain something.

Killua stood motionless behind the thug's body, his hand a claw with frighteningly sharp nails, and within his grasp the male's heart still beating as if it were in his body. When was the last time he plucked someone's heart out…? Ah that's right. It was the time of the Hunter Exam, and that obstinately bothersome guy kept sprouting something about wanting to tear him limb from limb. Too bad he wasn't skilled enough to do it.

Dropping the heart on the ground, Killua stared longingly at it, before mercilessly crushing the organ beneath his foot. Blood splattered across the ground and up his leg, stray drops landing on his white shirt and navy shorts. He should have been less messy with the job, but it didn't matter now that it was over. No one would dare come into an alley like this unless they were just begging to get mugged— The former assassin widened his eyes as the light returned to him, all irrational thinking thrown away as he came to the realization of his immoral actions.

The rain continued to fall as time stopped for Killua. That guy was so annoying… but did he really need to kill him because of it? No, he could have knocked him out, or done something even less harmful than that! Looking at the corpse, their blood was only lightly seeping from the fatal wound he had inflicted compared to the last time he performed that action. The view wasn't all that disgusting though—Shaking his head, Killua turned and ran from the alley while simultaneously forgetting the blood staining his clothes. The rain would deal with it enough while he made an escape back to the hotel. He'd need to change his clothes so Gon wouldn't ask questions and start worrying. Keeping Gon from worrying was the highest priority.

'_Stop looking at me!' _Killua yelled in his head, _'Mind your own business!'_. A bead of sweat ran down his chin as he picked up the pace. He didn't even think about using his enhanced speed, as his thoughts were all over the place and he almost bumped into a couple of people along the way. The rain hit him like a shower, and all he could feel was the coldness with no source of warmth. He didn't deserve warmth… he was a cold hearted killer – it was his calling and he couldn't run from it.

As he opened his eyes, the hunter immediately crashed into something although he guessed it to be a wall due to his own foolishness. However, looking up and blinking a couple of times, he found it to be someone… who he certainly wasn't expecting to see.

"Ooh..? It's Illumi's little brother~ " It had to be anyone but this joker… Hisoka. What on Earth was he doing there in the first place? The magician tilted his head questioning, piercing gold eyes lying upon ocean blue. The very feeling of his stare unsettled the boy, and within seconds he was standing with tensed shoulders and a careful position.

"If you're looking for Gon, he isn't here." The Zoldyck said in an uninterested tone. He knew for a fact that Hisoka wouldn't do anything to harm him right now, but that didn't mean he would lower his guard for a second with this creep around. Just sensing his aura in front of him made Killua feel troubled.

Hisoka's trademark smile extended, and he narrowed his slanted eyes on the boy, an alluring hum escaping his throat while the rain muddled his hair and slithered it down. "I'm not here for him, boy. I'm here on business. " A cold-heartened chill ran down Killua's spine, making him turn his eyes elsewhere to avoid the stare of the other. Hisoka picked up the avoidance in his actions, his eyes sparking with delightfulness all the while intrigued as to why he seemed so nervous about him. As much as the magician would have loved to mess around with the child, he had other matters to attend to. So with a quiet chuckle, he kept his voice low where only Killua could hear him.

"Your eyes are lacking that little shine they always have…"

Killua widened his eyes and looked at him, swallowing down a lump in his throat at the imagery before him. An aura of intense blood thirst drove back Killua instantly, forcing him to step away from him at the moment he felt such danger being directed towards him from the red-headed clown.

"The next time we meet, I hope you'll have that back~ "

With that said, Hisoka disappeared under the cloak of the rain with a pleasant smile on his face, leaving Killua standing there unable to move an inch. He felt death's grip around his body, and he knew then that the next time they would meet; he was most certainly going to die by the hands of Hisoka… Thank god Gon wasn't there to see that… otherwise he would have just made things worse for the both of them. The thought of his friend standing there beside him felt calming, and he almost wished he hadn't walked off without him.

Lowering his head, the silver haired Hunter smiled slightly, and continued on to the hotel at a normal pace. No one noticed the blood since the rain did its job and washed most of it off, but that lingering uneasiness remained in the pit of Killua's stomach.

He just hoped it was nothing.

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**Thank you for reading. **


	4. Doubts

**Thank you for all the wonderful reviews! I really appreciate them, and they really motivate me to continue with this fanfic! :D **

**It's a pleasure writing for you all.**

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'_Could this be any more annoying?'_

Mere silence filled the hotel floor. The only resonances distinct to human ears were the pelts of rain clashing with the windows, and in the distance faint rumbles of thunder that would soon come to pass. It was early afternoon, but by the clouds appearance looming in the skies one would assume it was already the evening. The two boys sat on the bed one across from the other, their eyes locked in an intense contest to see who would be the first to break. It could have gone on for hours, had Killua's impatience not already been at breaking point. With legs crossed, the silver haired boy balled his hand into a fist, eye brow twitching. It went on for a mere couple of minutes, slowly counting couldn't take it as he eventually caved in to Gon's gentle yet fierce hazelnut eyes, and a loud sighed escaped as he frowned and yelled in frustration. This wasn't getting them anywhere, and he despised this silence between them!

"Alright fine!" Killua shouted in defeat. He couldn't keep it up this long when it came to Gon.

"So you'll tell me?" Gon beamed in victory as he leaned forward to hear what Killua had to say in response. "For real?" He insisted with a glint of hope in his eyes.

The other leaned back as Gon inched forward, sighing. "Yeah, okay," He ushered his friend while insistently pushing him back into his spot. At this point he didn't have a choice… "But don't interrupt until I'm done."

Earning a nod in return, Killua took in a breath and relaxed himself. "…So," the ex-assassin started, "I guess you noticed I've been acting kinda weird." Gon nodded once more to clarify his suspicions for the other's behaviour. "..And I guess you also know about what happened?"

"Not really, but I have a feeling." Gon creased his brows, but he had a general idea due to the smell from his friend's clothes. He wasn't mad at Killua for doing it, but he had to know why it occurred. Such actions from Killua was unexpected since he usually didn't lose his temper like that. So obviously the boy was bothered by something – he just didn't know what. This was the hard part however, telling him the events in order from the beginning. He usually skipped over the somewhat unnecessary points in the timeline. Knowing Gon he wanted to hear all of it though.

"Right…" the silver haired boy muttered in an unpleasant tone.

Taking out the _Nen _absorbed stone he had received from the markets that day, he playfully chucked it into the air, catching it in his hand and performing the same action again to keep his concentration going. Gon retained his eyes on Killua's, and with a thoughtful hum he decided to continue on. If he got to the point straight away he wouldn't incapacitate Gon's simple mind thankfully.

"It's hard to explain." The small gem landed on his hand with ease, and finally he stopped.

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The 'brief explanation' had regrettably turned into a sermon; with Killua explaining himself until Gon's head was steaming with misperception. His unpretentiousness was laughable, but this wasn't the time for it by the Zoldyck's book. Ultimately Gon understood (somewhat), but it had dealt enough damage to him he needed a break.

"Moron." Killua commented, standing from the bed and walking over to the bathroom. "I'm gonna take a shower."

He was still somewhat soaking from the downpour outside, and by the time he returned to the hotel Gon was hot on his trail with a disconcerting feeling that his best friend might have been in trouble. It was true, he _had _been, but the problem was dealt with. The bathroom door closed behind the young Hunter, and he briefly had a shower to warm himself up, changing into a new set of clothes and setting his skateboarder outfit up to dry. He came back out wearing a maroon tank top, with black and yellow trousers and a black wristband to compliment the outfit he had chosen.

While waiting for the shower to become vacant, Gon had thought about what Killua told him, trying to think up an idea of some sort to help him. He wasn't the brightest in planning, especially when it came to psychological complications. He certainly wasn't anything like a psychiatrist, that was for sure.

"Gon?" Killua asked, a quizzical look directed towards him.

He didn't receive an answer.

"_Gon."_

Again, nothing.

The Transmuter's eye twitched as a result, walking over and grabbing his ear while yanking it in his general direction. "Oi!" He raised his voice to Gon.

"Ow! Ow, that hurts!" Gon protested as his attention snapped to Killua, "Let go! I'm listening!"

"I didn't ask for you to worry about me, jeez," he let go of his ear and strolled over to the bolted window, water running down as a result of the hard rain still interminably falling. "So cut it out." Killua murmured in a quieter tone, shoving his hands into his pockets. He peered out to the city, Heaven's Arena in clear vision with its magnificence soaring over the neighboring infrastructure.

They occupied a room on the eighteenth floor from the ground level, giving them an exquisite view to work with when ruling landmarks in range. Killua had instructed Gon to ask for a place like this despite their minor shortage of Jenny to spend. The charge fee was average, but they didn't have the expenses necessary to stay there too long during their trip. The upper walls were printed with a particular cream coloured arrangement that looked to be florescent in design, but enough so it barely stuck out. The lower half graduated into a light shade of orange, pacifying the room with a warm radiance that made staying there all the more tranquil as a sanctuary. The furniture wasn't too fancy, but neither was it poor in taste or design. Nothing compared to the highest levels of Heaven's Arena, but altogether nicely premeditated.

A squeak from the bed broke the silence in the room, Gon jumping up from it eliciting such a sound. He took off his forest green jacket and smiled without so much as a worry, and turned to Killua who seemed more than interested in his own contemplations.

"Killua! You said you saw Hisoka, right?" He inquired with that same overpoweringly innocent grin.

"Hm? Uh…yeah." Killua idly responded.

"Do you know where he was going?" Gon pushed on, inspecting his friend's inactive presence by the window. "I want to ask him a couple of questions."

"No idea." His answers were almost robotic-like, and Gon silently worried for his comrade. He chose not to bother him from then on, and released a thoughtful 'hmm' while turning and sitting back on the pre-made bed. In time, his smile slinked back on his face, grinning like a whimsical fool.

'_What's he smiling for?' _The former assassin thought, watching apathetically from the reflection of the window, his body weightlessly slanting against the glass. _'There's nothing to smile about.'_

"Well!" Gon announced with a shrill of ascertained eagerness, "I'm gonna find and talk to Hisoka before we leave for Yorknew City. He might be on business, but I'll catch him when he's finished!" He liked to plan ahead, and this sounded good enough for him in the meantime.

"Killua, do you want to co-"

"No_._" Killua cut in, but noticed a glint in Gon's eyes. It twisted his stomach immensely by that look, and he quickly spoke up as a countermeasure, "I mean that creepy guy and I left on bad terms, so I don't really want to see him."

The rain suddenly came down harder, time passing while the sun set and the moon shined for its evening take over. Killua turned and faced the Enhancer in a bored demeanour. If he saw Hisoka as he was, there was no doubt in his mind the clown would kill him on the spot. His little 'unripened fruit' had failed to keep its glow and became nothing but a mistake to nurture. At least that's how he probably saw him—the very thought chilling his spine once more.

Gon eventually nodded his head and chuckled, "That makes sense! I'll just let you know when I've found him."

"Sure." Killua responded, the corner of his mouth curling up.

He's not running away… He's just avoiding Hisoka for now. It's not running… it's not a retreat. He's just being cautious is all.

Right?

He's not abandoning Gon...

_He'd die before that would happen._

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**Wow my head wasn't really in the game with this chapter, so I'll make up for it in the next! o . o**

**Prepare yourselves for plot twists!**


	5. Temptation

**Happy Valentines everyone!**

**I extended the length of this chapter for the sole reason of this special day. :)**

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Nightfall; the time when shadows linger in infinite darkness, all-pervading eyes watch unwary prey from the corners of the underworld. Where death gathers by the hands of criminals and rots under the teeth of disease infested creatures, unimaginable screams of agony echoing through alleys of feebly barricaded defence. Blood splatter and mind matter alike tinge the taciturn rigidity of man-made infrastructural halls of a base, silver blurs and lifeless bodies follow suit of an armadas call.

All of which none receive.

The colourless walls flourish with echoes of submissive retreat, the leader falling, body pinned to the ground. Nails of trained hands are rapid to cut off air, gasping and adrenaline filled wails of despair trail. No mistakes counted, and mere time waits for the encore of the play.

The protagonist bends down; eyes of a stringless marionette delve into endless fear. Lifting the weapon of bereavement, they halt—

Stop.

_Stop._

'_What the hell are you doing!?'_

Killua snapped back into reality, and froze on the spot.

'_What am I…' _he instantly thought, gaping at the sleeping boy below him. He had stepped from one nightmare into another, and could no longer tell what his true reality was. By the guise of the moon's location, it appeared to be midnight, or very early morning. The darkened clouds gave its light barely enough room to peer through, but enough to light up the horrifying scene before the young assassin.

His eyes widened, mouth open with lips quivering as he held back a shaking breath. Beads of nervous sweat ran down his skin as he found his body unresponsive. Gon lay sleeping on the bed, his innocence unwitting. But above, Killua stood beside him, spine bent down as he had stopped mere inches from his face. His hand ever so slightly touching the delicate skin of his neck, tempted to unsuspectedly end his existence. His lifeless eyes remaining transfixed on Gon the whole time, while his muscles silently yelled for control of his body, but to no avail in the attempt.

'_What is this..?' _Killua hesitantly asked himself, _'What am I doing?!' _He couldn't even manage to close his mouth, before he suddenly grit his teeth and tensed his whole form._ 'Stop it!' _He yelled in his head, veins clearly showing through his skin as his body pushed for manual control. If his body had synchronized with his emotions, his intense aura would have immediately woken Gon, only to be pierced by his nails.

"G-Get… " Killua opened his mouth, voice barely sounding, "…Away…" he spoke louder, the hand by his side shakily raising through the air. He took grip of his occupied hand, briskly strengthening his grasp around it. "…From Gon!" He hissed gallingly, taking complete control of his body.

A loud snap resonated through the room.

Gon's eyes snapped open as a result. He turned his head to find the room completely empty of his friend's presence. Sitting up, he apprehensively called out for him; "Killua?" yet had no response. His eyebrows creased and he moved off the bed, noticing the bathroom light was on. Maybe he had worried for nothing… but he felt a strange twinge of anxiousness for his friend. Something woke him, and for a good reason.

The door to the bathroom opened, and Gon found Killua walking out with a small wince, hoping it went unnoticed.

"Oh, you're awake." Killua observed him, "Did I wake you?"

The young Hunter shook his head, "I'm not sure what did." At least he spoke truthfully.

"You know…they say sometimes you wake up because someone is watching you." The silver haired boy grinned, walking over to the bed and lying down with his head to the pillow. He shifted uncomfortably and closed his eyes with a relaxed expression.

"Eh?" Gon blinked in surprise, "Really!?"

"…I was joking." The other opened an eye to him, raising his right hand and flicking him in the forehead good-naturedly. "Night."

"Ouch-" He rubbed the painful spot, noticing Killua had no more to say. Perhaps his 'sixth senses' were playing tricks on him. He didn't see anything wrong, and he was too tired to try and figure it out either.

By the time Gon had once more fallen into unconsciousness, Killua opened his eyes and sat up in the bed. With a small exhale, he grimaced uncomfortably again and clutched his left arm. Pulling up the sleeve of his shirt, a large bluish-purple bruise ran up from his wrist to the elbow, insinuating the bone had been broken from mere brute strength. Killua had broken his arm in an attempt to stop his body from killing Gon… who knew when this would happen again?

'_I'll do whatever it takes, Gon.' _He thought soundlessly.

'_I'll break as many bones in my body to keep you safe from me."_

* * *

"Oi Gon." Killua appeared behind his friend as he was about to leave the hotel in order to search for Hisoka.

Gon stopped mid-walk, turning to see Killua. He hadn't expected him to show up as he was heading out. In fact when he had left, the boy was still asleep in bed. He had assumed that perhaps his lack of sleep lately was the reason for it.

The assassin's lips curled up as he smiled supportively towards him, "Good luck finding Hisoka. I'll be heading out too so text me know when you find the guy."

Gon smiled back energetically, nodding his head with a stifle of excited laughter, "Got it!"

Waving to each other they parted ways for the day, Killua being left on his own accords whereas Gon searched for the magician within the region. The only trouble concerning Killua however was the fact he disabled his own arm, marking it far more difficult to act about like nothing was wrong. He'd need to fix it somehow, and time was of the essence before Gon found out- no, he didn't need to find out how it happened… He could just think up a lie quite effortlessly. After all…Transmuter's were considered whimsical liars. Not to mention his friend's naivety it made lying all the easier.

Using his only functioning arm, he took out his phone and swiftly dialled a number into the pad. The phone called out a couple of times before someone picked up from the other end.

"Hello? This is-" They started.

"Old man." Killua cut in with a bored expression, leaning his weight against a wall. The line went silent after the intended insult, and the receiver was evidently infuriated from what he called him.

A loud short fused 'tsk' escape the stranger, and they abruptly yelled into the phone to Killua, "Hey, brat! I told you I'm not-"

"Yeah, yeah. I get it." The child rolled his eyes with a mischievous chortle. There was no harm in screwing around with this guy once in a while. He always took things too earnestly; so of course he couldn't pass up the chance.

"—And stop interrupting me! Honestly…" They sighed with frustration, taking a moment to calm their self before speaking up. "…So what is it you want?"

"I want you to come here."

"Now why the hell should I do that!?" They spoke up angrily.

Killua wasn't reluctant to tell why he needed that old man there, but he wouldn't come unless he had an explanation. He'd done enough explaining over the days as it was! Why couldn't they just give a straight answer instead of making it complicated? He narrowed his eyes, gripping the phone harshly as his impatience wavered again.

"Leorio, I'm not in the mood, ok? Just get over here! I know you can track me with your phone's GPS, so use that."

"Not until you tell me what's going on! Speak up!" Leorio responded, causing Killua's leaking aura to spike suddenly. He was trying immensely to control himself… but this idiot just couldn't take orders without barking back like a dog with a bite barely hard enough to scratch him.

"_I screwed up!_" Killua yelled into the phone, eyes enraged and vicious. Taking a deep breath, he tried to relax and continued with a quieter attitude, "…Gon doesn't even need to know you were here."

Leorio at the time he leaned away from the phone, blinking in a surprised fashion to the tone of Killua. He was seriously missing out on something if the kid was acting that way for no reason. Sure he demanded reasons, but to react that way… he didn't quite understand. As his nerves steadied, he realistically thought about Killua's request, and put the phone back to his ear with an exhale, "I'll do what I can… but I'm busy right now! So... it might be in a couple of days."

* * *

"Ah… I'm so bored." Killua grumbled as he strolled along the walk path, passing by abundant strangers who took no notice of him. Hands were stuffed in empty pockets, a black hood riding over his head to conceal his features. The clothing in question was mid-sleeved, but something he wished was completely covered due to his broken arm, which he had to delicately move around with his uninjured limb. He desired to be alone for the protection of himself and others, but he really wanted the company as well… like Gon. Maybe he should have tailed him in his search for Hisoka, but that would have been branded stalking. He certainly wasn't a stalker!

Swivelling out of the way of people, Killua turned his head when he came across the alley from the other day. The one specifically where he had murdered that thug. A bored expression hung down on him, and he took in the scene.

The body had been removed from sight, unsurprisingly, and tape covered bother entries into said backstreet. Remnants of blood stained the walls and cemented ground, a deep maroon settling into the surfaces. They must have wondered who would do such a thing to a guy like that… and it wouldn't have surprised him if the police were already trying to find a perpetrator for it too. But they wouldn't find anything on him, as he didn't give them a chance. There was no found evidence, and he had nothing to worry his pretty little head over. Not that he was worried at all… He could handle them.

"How horrible..." A distant whisper brought Killua's attention over. His dead gaze came to a couple looking at the same area as him.

"I heard an innocent man was killed over there." The woman said to her beloved, earning a sincere hold of hand.

"It's alright, love. I'll keep you safe."

Killua's eyes remained sheltered by the black of his hood. Underneath, they watched the couple walk away leniently. He stayed put for a couple of minutes before deciding to leave the area. If he lingered for too long some would become suspicious of his behaviour. He couldn't risk becoming a suspect for something so stupid like killing a thug.

Bowing his head, he kept it low as the rain continued to fall. _'When is it going to stop?' _He silently thought to himself, treading mindlessly down the path. _'It's like it corresponds with my emotions…' _

The boy chuckled, _'Maybe it does.'_

* * *

**Wow things aren't looking well for Killua are they?**

**I actually had a lot of fun with Leorio and Killua. Their arguments and insults are the best thing. **


	6. Breaking

**Hello everyone! I'm very sorry for the delays!**

**Things have been really crazy in real life, but hopefully this will make up for it!**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

"I can't reach him…" A voice muttered in dissatisfaction.

The boy sat on the secluded bench under the cover of a dark green umbrella, eyes filled with uneasiness. In his hand was a phone, a faint beep resonating from the device to show the ignored response from whomever he had attempted to call. Swinging his legs one after the other in a continuous pattern, he tilted his head up to convey the gloomy clouds hanging above the region. Despite the light sprinkle of rain on his clothing and skin, his hairstyle astoundingly remained completely intact. He felt cold… this chill that ran through his skin made him uncomfortable to the point he couldn't sit still, and constantly fumbled about in his spot.

After the third try to call Killua, Gon found it was useless to contact him that way, even after he had suggested it. He might have been busy, but he rarely turned off his phone when he was expecting a call at some point. It only reinforced the uncertainties Gon had for his friend and his recent behaviour. Their conversation a few nights ago had settled matters temporarily, but now he was convinced there were more than simple dreams driving his friend to act strange. What was on his mind? What could he possibly be thinking this moment where ever he might have been?

"Mm...That expression looks delicious~" A sneer came from behind the young Hunter, and he jumped from his seat in a fit of panic, dropping his umbrella on the ground with a look of shock spread across his features.

That was the scariest moment he had experienced in a very long time.

"H-Hisoka…" Gon said, wondering how on Earth he had found him. Well, it saved time for him in his search, which was for sure.

Raising his hand with a short wave, the magician smiled widely, circling around the public bench to the other who was more than willing to move away in response. It hardly bothered the man, as a quiet chuckled escaped his lips, inching closer to Gon. His eyes narrowed into slits, gold irises watching him like a predator to its unwary prey.

"I heard you were looking for me." He hummed in an appealing tone.

"Eh?" Gon blinked, "How did you know?"

Another chortle, "That's a secret~" He hushed, index finger looming over his lips. Brushing the same hand through his hair, he glanced down at the boy, smile widening at his outwardly confused appearance. The boy dressed in green heightened his guard, cautiously walking near the man to retrieve his umbrella that he had dropped on the ground. The rain was soaking him to the bone…

"Well... I have a couple of questions for you." Gon continued.

"Shoot." Hisoka purred in response.

Gon glanced down at his phone in his hand, "You and Killua spoke, right?" A twinge in Hisoka's brow confirmed that. "Was he acting kind of different?"

"Different?" The man repeated, blinking supposedly with inquisitiveness.

"Yeah." Gon nodded with a buoyant shine. He wasn't expecting much out of this guy considering his difficult personality, but he might have had beneficial information to give him. He needed to know more about whatever was happening to his friend.

"I wonder…" He mused with interest, knowing full well that Gon would get agitated over his answer, precisely why he gave it. The madman in front slipped an Ace of Spades out of nowhere into his own hand, admiring the card as if it held some sort of secret. Slowly, his attention drove to another card that that came from behind the previous one, followed by another. In one movement, they each disappeared; in turn a flock of petals fell from his hand instead. "Was he any _different _from before?"

Hazelnut eyes glinted with urgency, and Hisoka immediately caught on to Gon's silent rejoinder.

'_Ah…Don't look at me like that…' _Hisoka smirked at his thoughts, _'…You'll get me excited.'_

Closing his eyes momentarily, the joker finally answered, "Indeed…your friend was tense when I saw him." As he reopened them, his eyes screamed out for exhilaration, remembering the look on Killua's face when they had previously encountered one another. "He looked like he was ready to _kill_…"

* * *

The distinct smell of food ravished the air, the bountiful numbers of people overflowed the paths and restaurants lined in the streets. Umbrellas blocked the descent of rain, splashing over water-proof material to which it sheltered the delicate skin of humans. Tongues of banter and laughs of gossip reached eavesdropping trouble, and among the crowd sat a lone wolf inside one of the cafés, silent in treatment. With eyes jaded and unfocused, their only amusement was the easy drumming of fingers on the table.

"Can I get you anything?" A waitress travelled over to the table, a gentle smile occupying her expression as she softly moved her ginger coloured hair off her shoulder.

"No." Killua immediately replied, his voice feverishly cold and unbalanced.

Such a response caught the woman off-guard, but she didn't push for anything. With a suddenly nervous look, she bowed her head and took off. Were all children like that these days? So ill-mannered and frightening… She hadn't met someone like that before at such an age. If someone was to serve that young man, she was not going to do it. With only a few words, the waitress knew not to go near that child. Something deep unsettled her, although she could not understand what, she knew it was from Killua.

After a moment, Killua blinked confoundedly, lifting his head and eyeing over the woman briskly walking away from him, "Ah- Sorry if I sounded harsh."

The woman stopped, turned her head and smiled as best she could for the boy, "N-No that's quite alright! Enjoy your day, young man." With that, she fidgeted with the small notebook in her grasp and took off to serve other waiting customers.

Killua settled into his seat with a lousy huff, his healthy arm gripped onto the other while all constant pain appeared inexistent to his expression. It was when he had left the hotel that day he noticed his Nen was unrestrained around his form, steering people away from him when they felt uneventful chills down their spines as he merely passed by. It was never hard to control himself or his own aura for that matter, but now every little detail had a difficulty of its own. Breathing, moving—even dialogue was harder than it used to be. Killua knew very well the trouble that dawned upon him, nevertheless that did not mean he could quite so effortlessly fix it.

'_You were born to be a killer.' _Killua grimaced, _'As one who lives in the shadows, you can only feel pleasure when people die.'_ The silver haired boy clutched his arm harder as Illumi's words resonated in his head.

'_You'll get the urge to see if you can kill him or not, because you have the soul of a killer.'_

A loud thud echoed through the café brusquely, and Killua stood from his seat, a large indent within the metal of the table. Quickly, he walked out of the café as to not drag attention towards himself and left the area. He was going to have to pay for that damage… or maybe the Hunters Association could take care of it for him.

"Illumi doesn't know anything about me…" Killua swore under his voice, swiftly picking up the pace as he clearly remembered his older brother's words.

A shiver coursed through his body and he widened his eyes, stopping in his tracks almost instantly and turned around. He had felt something hostile towards him… it was so familiar he had broken out in a sweat as soon as he felt the pressure of their aura lingering behind. People pushed passed him, and no matter how hard his eyes searched the path, he couldn't find the source of that ominous Nen. They must have used _Zetsu_ to hide it from there on, but that presence…who was it from?

'_I'm always watching you, Kil.'_

Killua grunted, narrowing his eyes in a threatening modus. He turned once more and continued on his way, body heavily stressed under the pressure of Illumi's words in his head. He would never leave him alone no matter what he did, but he didn't have time to deal with his older brother's presence in his mind. No, it would only make things worse. He might actually end up… No! He would never do that! He promised he would not hurt Gon. He would break down his very body before that happened. Shaking his head, Killua decided to stay under cover by the small amount of shelter given from stores lining up the street. It wasn't much, but he didn't feel like getting drenched by the rain. He sought comforting warmth…something to ease his nerves rather than the endless shower of rain.

A stand nearby happened to be selling umbrellas, and Killua idly approached the vendor, grabbing an umbrella and paying for it without any trade of words. While opening it up, the salesman eyed the Hunter with indifference, "You're soaking… have you been out here that long without an umbrella?"

Killua held the umbrella tightly within his grasp, his other hand cautiously tucked into his pocket. Turning away from the stranger, Killua shrugged, "I guess." He didn't feel like talking to anyone he didn't know, so he thought about quitting the chit-chat and moving along. However the male nearby thought differently to his own mindset as a smile set on his expression, leaning informally on the stand in front.

"You should watch yourself; otherwise you'll catch a cold." They commented.

The words may have been for the care of the child, but Killua did not take them in whole heartedly. He simply frowned as a result and pouted. The Zoldyck never did like advice given to him, and he didn't need this old man telling him how he should take care of himself. As if he could actually catch a cold. His body was trained for things far worse than a little illness from the cold weather they were receiving. Well, it's not as if the man knew that, so he couldn't blame him.

"It's not like I could get sick that easily." Killua finally retorted with disregard. "Er…thanks anyway."

"No problem…" The vendor replied, his tone slowly turning numb," Don't lose your umbrella though_, Kil_."

'_What did he…' _

Killua's eyes widened immensely, shock taking control of his entire body. He slowly began trembling at the familiar voice that declared behind him where the man was at the public stall, a new heightened fear that kept him from turning around to see who it was that spoke to him. His hand dared to drop the umbrella and push his legs to run as fast as he could, but no. He was stuck, as if his legs had been trapped in dry concrete. Time stopped in that sense, and no matter how much he tried to move, it was fatal.

Impulsively, Killua could feel a hand reaching for him from the direction he could have sworn his brother's voice was, and his terrors only developed the closer they came to contact with his shoulder. He couldn't move, he couldn't speak, his mind raced, his eyes begged for his paralysis to stop so he could run- Illumi couldn't take him back to Kukuroo Mountain now! Anytime but now, he hadn't settled his matters, he hadn't finished his adventure with Gon-!

The thin hand reached Killua's shoulder, and he was instantly brought out of his thoughts.

That wasn't Illumi's hand…

"Young man?"

The former assassin's body rotated around, and Killua found himself face to face with the trade vendor. He was a mess; sweat running down his pale skin, his hand still slightly shaking in fear of his older brother.

Had those words been nothing but a delusion?

Was he finally losing it?

* * *

**If you'd like to review, that would really help motivate me! :)**

**See ya next chapter!**


	7. Trust and Treatment

"Oi, oi! Open up! You're the one who called me here!"

The clashing of fist against door echoed through the entirety of the hotel's eighteenth floor, a suited man carrying a briefcase angrily yelling at the blockade in front of him. Pushing up his teashade sunglasses, the man cussed and stood his ground, intolerantly waiting for the door to open. This was going on forever, and his patience was now running thin due to that brat's attitude towards him. He seriously needed to learn respect for his elders.

"I was nice enough to push aside all of my studies and come here today instead… and this is how I'm treated?!"

When Leorio had arrived at the hotel following the GPS on his phone connected to Killua's, he had asked reception for the room the two boys were staying in. When they had questioned him, all he was required to do was show off his Hunter's license. That in itself was enough to persuade and keep the employees from asking anymore questions about the problem. But when the man reached Gon's room, the individual inside denied him admission. His behaviour was erratic and behind that closed door Leorio knew something had shaken him up. He refused to neither speak nor make any contact, but sooner or later he would cave in…

"…Did you see Gon along the way?" The young Hunter finally responded from the other side of the wall. Their tone was impassive and forcefully deprived of any emotion, but Leorio chose to ignore it, a low-slung groan escaping his lips.

"No." He mumbled, "Now let me in or I'm leaving."

There was a quiet 'click' on the other side of the door, and the boy hesitantly opened inward to the room. Stepping away from the entrance Killua pressed his back against the wall to give Leorio space to walk in, silence creeping throughout the apartment. Closing the door as he entered, Leorio turned to Killua, a soft frown planted across his features. He was definitely furious yet his obvious concern for the child overwhelmed those negative sentiments. As he set down the briefcase on the table facing the wall, the soon-to-be doctor faced the former assassin. He crossed his arms and waited; waited for the reason he had come there.

Killua would keep it nice and simple for him, after all he didn't need a thorough justification. However… not just yet. Slowly, his swollen looking arm was brought to light, and Leorio widened his eyes at the appearance of the broken limb. He opened his mouth to speak, but couldn't find any words. By its appearance it needed immediate treatment, and no time for the discussion of how it happened.

Opening his carry-case, Leorio sat down and gestured for the Transmuter to come closer. As he complied, the suited male took hold of his upper arm, moved it above his heart and delicately began to treat it in time with careful precision. The pain was evenly tolerable to Killua, but despite that knowledge, Leorio was gentle towards his wounds. After injecting a substance to bring down the swelling, he put the syringe away and took out a bandage. Later finishing up the treatment, Leorio scratched his head idly while packing up his equipment. As he locked the case in front, Killua mumbled under his breath.

"That'll do for now. You'll need to go to a hospital though." Leorio scratched the back of his head in thought.

"Thanks…Leorio."

The gratitude was unexpected, and hearing it from him of all people made it more awkward than satisfying. Clearing his throat, Leorio waved his hand, "H-Hey I helped because you're a friend. No thanks needed."

Killua tipped his head down and Leorio felt he was back at square one; absolute silence.

"…I broke my arm."

"W-What?" Leorio asked him. Why would the child break his own body?

"I did it to-!" A moment of hesitation came over Killua, and he settled into his seat, biting his lower lip before continuing, "-to protect Gon, from myself." If he hadn't then his best friend would be dead. His body would lifelessly occupy the bed where his blood would endlessly gush from his neck where his head used to be.

"Killua, tell me what's happening." The training doctor inquired.

The silver haired Hunter lightly moved his broken arm as he felt it go numb, his body slumping lazily against the chair. Leorio leaned forward to hear him out, a soft frown across his face. There was no escaping it now. Killua couldn't handle the strain anymore for keeping it a secret to himself. If this continued his mentality would shatter and he was likely to injure anyone who came into his sight, or worse.

Killua narrowed his eyes sorrowfully, swallowing a lump in his throat, "I don't want Gon to find out."

"I'll keep quiet." The male nodded in promise. He understood Killua's concern for his friend. Gon was the type you didn't want to keep secrets from. It was hard, but in this condition it had to be done; at least that's what Leorio assumed. For Killua to open his mouth to Leorio about this exposed the level of extreme help he required.

For the past hour since Killua's encounter with the salesman, the downpour outside had lastly seized. But the remaining shadowy mists indicated they would continue on that same day. For the interim it was a fresh breath of air for residents. A small glimpse of light peered through the clouds, its rays warm and welcoming to whomever it touched. It offered populaces a hope that soon the storm would be over, and the sun's bright nature would heighten the moods of everyone who dwelled in it. However these faiths were short lived, and the overpowering storm clouds locked up that only enlightening grace from the heavens.

"I've been delusional, I guess. I hear my big brother's voice in my head, I mistake people for being someone else—" Killua widened his eyes, fear welling up inside, "My temper is getting worse. It's so bad I want to knock out someone for even looking at me."

"Gon too?" Leorio tested.

Another moment of hesitance followed, and he nodded his head. The night before repeated in his head, harsh flashes of tear-jerking moments making him tense and grit his teeth. The image of his claws up against Gon's delicate skin forced his breath to become ragged and hard to intake air. The images blinded his vision and the world around him melted away along with most of his senses. Leorio noticed the changes in his behaviour and hastily spoke up to snatch his attention.

"_Killua!_" His voice resonated throughout the room, enough to bring Killua back to reality.

He quietly gasped, shifted his eyes to meet the male's own. "…S-Sorry. It was nothing." He looked down at his lap and halted. He shook his head and seemed determined to talk about it, "No. It was… the other night."

Leorio crossed his arms, urging the child to continue.

"I was having a nightmare about the days when I was an assassin, where I was about the kill my target. But before that, I woke up."Complete silence broke out as his words were delayed._ 'Don't hesitate!' _Killua thought, _'Keep going. Someone needs to know about this. It'll drive you insane if you keep it secret for any longer. It doesn't matter who it is…as long as it isn't Gon.'_

"When I woke up I was-" He accidentally stuttered, cussing under his voice, "-I was about to kill Gon!"

He finally said it. But he thought he would have felt better after admitting that… Instead a bitter emotion of guilt coursed through him, and his skin paled at the nauseating sensation. Leorio's fearful expression backed up that remorse, and he forced his head to turn away, to try and avoid the assuming anger the older male would most likely have. He had almost killed his friend. What kind of colleague wouldn't be pissed after hearing that from the convector them self? The longer his ideas built up, he began to assume he would be looked down upon. Leorio wouldn't be able to look at his face any longer; he'd want him out of his sight.

A gentle hand touched his shoulder and Killua looked up to meet Leorio's eyes. The man offered a stern look, yet his eyes held no bitter judgement in them. With no words exchanged, Killua caught on to his intentions, and looked back down to his lap. He wasn't mad…

"Before I could kill him, I broke my arm." The former assassin finish, closing his eyes as his hand balled into fist.

"Hmm." Leorio considered the circumstances of what happened and stood up from his chair. The male grabbed his briefcase, stuffing his free hand into his pocket. "If you can still stop yourself, then there's still hope." He proclaimed with honesty, "You don't want to hurt Gon, so you're still human." He pushed up his sunglasses, "Unlike your family."

Killua took no offence by his words. It was true. The Zoldycks were monsters compared to normal humans. They had no remorse for killing people; in fact they enjoyed the thrill of it. They were nothing but residents of the underworld and they wanted nothing more but to make Killua a passionless puppet of the darkness. Because of them however… he met Gon. So he could be thankful for that.

"What the-"

Killua turned his head to Leorio who stopped midway in front of the door. The door had unexpectedly cracked open mere seconds after he had planned to leave, as if someone had been standing outside the whole time. Unyielding hazelnut orbs placed on brown, then swiftly changed to Killua's own ocean blue.

The young former assassin's eyes glistened at the young form entering the room, "G-Gon…"

'_Shit…did he hear everything?'_

* * *

**Aaauugh I didn't do so well on this chapter. Sorry about that. ^^; ****I promise I'll do better on the next! Or at least I'll try to. I think we can all agree I am not and never will be a doctor.**

**Reviews are encouraged but not obligatory!**

** I hope you enjoyed the chapter! **


	8. We're Friends

**I've been waiting to write this chapter for a while~**

***Cracks knuckles***

* * *

How long had he been out there for?

What's more surprising is the fact he had hidden his presence using _Zetsu_, as if he distinguished something undisclosed was occurring inside their hotel room. Upon seeing his most trusted friend enter the room, Killua froze in his spot with his broken arm out in the open, a cloth wrapping around the injury and his neck, holding the limb against his chest. The spikey haired Hunter wasn't expected to return for another hour, so it his arrival caught Killua off-guard. Gon's interest moved directly from Leorio, then to Killua in a matter of moments, putting his dark green umbrella down leaned against the wall. He treaded to the silver haired child and continued to watch in utter silence.

As he was about to speak, Gon cut in with a question that made him once again silent.

"Killua. Are we friends?"

His voice was firm and demanding of an answer, his stare unyielding in a battle for answers from Killua. It was a simple question, but the meaning held everything between them. Killua leaned forward and voiced his statement bluntly.

"Of course we are-"

"So then why!?" Gon interrupted him. His hands balled into fists to show his recognizable anger welling up, "Why didn't you tell me anything?"

Killua leaned back against the chair and avoided his gaze as best he could. He held back from telling Gon for his own protection, not because they weren't friends. He didn't want to risk putting him in danger because he was losing it. But he wouldn't buy that kind of excuse, would he? It pained him to lie, but it hurt so much more to know he was wounded by his mistakes. How pathetic… he felt so useless right now. Where did his modest and naturally kind instincts go? Now, he was no more than a shaking child whom feared every corner of the Earth.

He couldn't think of an answer… he didn't know what to say. Before he knew it however he had already started talking with another excuse, "You have your own problems to take care of. So I…" Killua's words died off, and his lowered his head. Silver wisps of hair covered his eyes, and he went into internal quarantine.

Leorio watched the two boys with a sense of discomfort. He sighed and bowed his head politely, then excused himself from the room and shut the door in his leave. He knew not to get mixed up in their mess, and his business was finished anyway. For now he could travel back to his temporary home and study until the appointed meeting they had scheduled a half month from then. Until that time, he silently hoped they would be able to settle their problems and make up. It was hard enough seeing them doubt their friendship like that. For the time they knew each other they were inseparable… but now he couldn't be so sure.

"You aren't Killua." Gon abruptly pronounced.

Killua lifted his head in question, "W-What?" What could he have meant by that? This was the real Killua Zoldyck sitting in front of him. The same silver hair and blue eyes – the one and only former assassin of the Zoldyck family.

"The Killua I know wouldn't run from me and make excuses." Gon's confrontations beat severely on his friend, but he confidently spoke his mind.

A crack of lightning burst through the clouds outside, and the boundless downpour of rain instigated once again. The drops pelted against the windows, but it did not perturb the two boys within the room. With a flash of lightning, it lit up the room and illuminated the darkness settling into each corner of the occupied apartment. The black void curled back and leeched to the walls as Gon's outstanding fortitude excelled in his aura.

"The Killua I know wouldn't lie to me! " The green outfitted Hunter pushed on with perseverance and stepped towards the other, in response it made Killua's eyes widen with astonishment. The light that radiated from him was really too much… he couldn't look at him for too long otherwise he'd be blinded.

"He'd trust me with his _life_ when we fight against really strong enemies! He is my _best friend_ in the world and I would fight for him no matter what!"

Silence.

He couldn't be called Killua anymore. Killua is… his own person. He doesn't stand for other's bossing him around; especially those of his family. He is headstrong, quick thinking and most of all an honest, caring friend to Gon Freecss. They shared their lives, beliefs and deepest emotions with one another. Did none of that ever exist to the silver haired boy? No... Their friendship meant absolutely everything to him. Without Gon, he had no reason to continue travelling. Without him, he would be back at Kukuroo Mountain training to become a master assassin under his brother's orders— His brother… Illumi.

That bastard… He had gotten into his head and started this mess. With his constant whispering echoing in the walls of his mind, influencing him to act against how he wished. He invaded his dreams and turned them into nightmares, all for the sake of making him an emotionless killing machine. But no more… he wouldn't allow him to pull the child by strings anymore. He had Gon- He had always been by his side and not a moment passed where he wasn't willing to help him. He had forgotten Gon was so stubborn like that… he would risk his own life for the sake of saving his friend- no. No he would live, and win for the sake of his friend, and continue to search for his father.

That is what made him so strong. That…is why he envied him so much. He couldn't ask for a better friend than that naïve boy. He knew that now.

A drop of clear liquid landed on Killua's hand, and he stared at it in confusion. Another fell, he quickly wiped his hand, and brushed it across his eyes with a concealed sniffle while hiding his tears. Maybe the roof was leaking, that must have been it.

"J-Jeez… don't you get embarrassed saying that stuff?" Killua light-heartedly joked, rubbing his eyes more then took his hand away to see.

Gon blinked as if it meant nothing to him. But seeing his eyes look at him now, made the Hunter smile. He had his friend's trust back… he just knew it. That look on his face had been extinguished and Killua was brought back to his former senses. He knew he could tell Gon anything without any worries. He was always there, willing and trying to keep his Killua moving through thick and thin.

Gon's smile brightened up the room, and he laughed at what Killua had to say. All aspects of his anger had vanished into thin air.

He was truly astonishing, that mere words were no match against him. He never gave up on his friend, and he knew that he could bring him back from the darkness. This boy… only he was capable of such abilities. Not even the strongest of Nen could break through it, and that is what attracted so many people around him. Kurapika, Leorio… Killua now understood. He was not alone.

The pale skinned boy stood up, and a smile spread across his cheeks. No matter what was happening, he would beat this with Gon at his side. Illumi could not control him, and his body was his own to harness. If in the end he came face to face with his own brother, he would not run and cower. He would fight, with his best friend watching his back. Hesitance no longer kept him blinded, and he held his hand out balled into a fist.

Gon continued to smile, and mirrored the young Hunter's actions, their fists joining as a strong sign of companionship between them.

'_No matter what happens Gon, I'll protect you.'_

'_No matter what happens Killua, I'll protect you.'_

* * *

**I REGRET WHAT I DID BECAUSE I MADE MYSELF CRY!**

**I've been listening to the saddest songs in HunterxHunter while writing this and I'm sorry if I made anyone else cry. **

**But anyway! See ya next chapter!**


	9. Dark Humor

Was it all really in his head?

Were they all nothing but doubts?

But if so where had it all sprouted from?

A week had passed since the incident and only a few days remained before they would leave for Yorknew City. The two young hunters strolled through the streets of the metropolitan, caught up in their conversation about what they would do with Leorio once the time came to meet up. They had already moved on from what transpired the other week, acting as if it had never happened in the first place. It was better that way, because Killua did not want to go through such difficult times with his best friend again.

Since that period, the descent of rain had lastly stopped, albeit the despondent clouds remained in their dormant state, allowing the rays of light from the sun to peak through every once in a while. It was nice whenever it shined on them; the warm light comforting with its gentle embrace, melting away the cold shackles that grew from the blistering winter days.

"Hey, Gon." Killua started, "You never actually told me why you started to look for Hisoka. Like what questions did you ask?"

"Eh?" The spikey haired boy tilted his head, his memory in need of jogging. He put a finger to his chin in deep thought and recalled what he meant. "At that time…last week?"

The Zoldyck nodded.

A loud hum of contemplation escaped Gon's lips and persisted for a minute. He looked up as the hum sustained, before it stopped moments later. With a cheeky grin he turned to Killua, "That's a secret!"'

"Wha-" Killua narrowed his eyes with an annoyed expression, and a twinge of sarcastic disgust on his features. "Man, you're starting to sound like him!"

"Really?" Gon leaned back, smiling as per usual.

"Yeah and it's creepy! I can already see the resemblance!" The boy crossed his arms as he turned away from him, persistently disclosing that Gon might turn into Hisoka. The thought was certainly perturbing and dear god why did he think of that in the first place? Now he'd imagine him wearing strange clown costumes for the rest of the day, or at least until he forgot about the conversation – which would prove difficult.

Gon wasn't doing any better; inspecting his body all over to make sure none of it resembled Hisoka's. When he finished, he turned to Killua who held a smug smile on his face, before they both burst out laughing.

It felt good… he hadn't had this much fun in a while. He could be himself without worry for his brother watching him, or the things he was foretold to do. Killua could finally relax and do what he had planned to do from the beginning of his journey, to support Gon, to always be there for him in the toughest of times. And no matter how hard he tried, that darn smile couldn't leave his lips. But that was good wasn't it? It meant he was truly happy, and absolutely nothing could hold him back now.

A tongue swiped along thin lips, the figure tall and masculine in build watched the young boys converse with each other. A delighted sneer escaped the stranger, as he crept closer to his unsuspecting prey. Long, thin fingers with delicately sharp nails patted the shoulder of the silver haired child, and as he froze, Hisoka could feel himself shiver at the pleasure of his timely reaction.

"I had nothing to worry about, then." Hisoka purred into Killua's ear, and in a mere instance Killua had jumped away from him to reach Gon's side.

Gon was surprised to find the red-head standing there, but took no defensve measures against him. He didn't look like he wanted to fight, thankfully. Still his presence there was disconcerting enough that Killua stood guard, a watchful expression aimed towards the grinning adult. The last time they had met, he knew Hisoka had planned on killing him. Nothing could have changed his mind since then, right?

"Hisoka?" Gon asked. He could have sworn that guy had a sixth sense when someone was talking about him. Another listed reason why he was so bloodcurdlingly unnerving.

"Ya, Gon." Hisoka chortled with liking, turning his head to face Killua, "You have that shine in your eyes again- but… it's still not quite there yet~" The magician could tell from the confusion on Killua's face he didn't quite understand what he had meant. But in due time he would fully grasp his words. Hisoka lifted his hand and put a finger to his lips, quietly shushing himself from speaking anymore; after all he didn't want to ruin the fun. If he did he was certain to get in trouble for it by a particular person, a pain he didn't bother to handle at the moment.

"What are you doing here, Hisoka?" Killua retained his distance and ignored his bizarre sentiments.

"Me? I'm here to see-"

A fleeting pulse hit Hisoka from behind and he halted in his speech. A coy grin spreading from cheek to cheek when he pulled out of the conversation and shook his head. It was threatening enough to send any child running into a corner for the rest of their lives, but he was no pubescent. It merely caught his attention and stopped him from giving out too much information. With a slightly disappointed sigh, the joker walked passed Gon and Killua, covertly slipping something into the Zoldyck's pocket. "No, it doesn't matter." He chuckled, "Buh-bye, my little fruits~"

By the time they turned around, Hisoka was already gone.

"That was strange…" Gon commented. He couldn't put his finger on it, but it seemed as if something forced Hisoka to retire from the conversation. "I wonder who he was here to see."

"Doesn't matter. Come on, let's go." Killua cut in, his uninjured hand leisurely resting on the back of his head. As he turned to leave with Gon, Killua briefly halted and felt a foreign object in his pocket. It didn't feel like anything he had put in there, since his Hunter Licence was in the left pocket instead of the right. He tilted his head and felt the inside of his pocket, taking out the item that had been secretly placed there. It was a card left by Hisoka, specifically the Joker card located in the deck. However this Joker card had been modified. The character's face in question had been painted on, their cheeks showing the same star and tear symbol resembling Hisoka's.

A shallow groan came from the boy as he figured the magician would have left it there. Gon quietly peaked over his friend's shoulder with curiosity, taking a look at the aforementioned object. He didn't appear to comprehend what it had been put in place for, but neither had Killua. To inspect it further, the card was turned over, but the other side happened to be completely blank. They looked at each other and shrugged, Gon being the one to give up first. Perhaps Hisoka placed it in his pocket to mess around with them, considering his personality that was highly likely. But something seemed…odd about it.

It was the same feeling Killua had gotten when he and Gon travelled to the city markets that one time. Where that middle aged salesman had allowed Killua to keep that Nen infused stone he'd picked out—Wait, that was it!

'_Gyo'. _Concentrated Nen surrounded Killua's eyes in a flash, and his directed his gaze to the back of Hisoka's Joker card. As he suspected, a small form of Nen had been focused to spell out a couple of words, a message to him. Had it only been for him? Had Hisoka known earlier that Gon would not think of that method at the same time he did?

The message read in a slick pink aura, _'Watch him closely'._

Afterwards, the aura faded away into nothing, no doubt because of the distance between them and the owner of it. What did it mean? Was he referring to Gon in the message? What reason did he need to watch his friend closely? He had nothing to suspect from him, unless he had meant another individual in the message. It was left so unclear; Killua began to ponder at the inner meaning of Hisoka's undefined memo.

'_Hold on…' _Killua's eyes fixated on his surroundings, and the hunter found himself standing alone on the path he and Gon had taken.

"G-Gon?" The young boy's cautious mindset took over, and his eyes broadened at the arriving theory that message had truly been directed towards Gon. A harsh spiral of anxiety tightened in his stomach, and Killua gripped his abdomen as a result. "Gon!?"

'_Shit- I can't feel his aura! And I can't track him either!' _His loud thoughts echoed in his head, and he could feel his existence becoming unstable at the idea of his friend being gone. All of this talk about being fine and having hope had loosened its screws the longer Killua searched for his friend. To no avail however did he find the green outfitted boy. He couldn't have just disappeared from the face of the world, and if he was going to leave he would have said something. He wouldn't abandon him like that! He wouldn't betray him!

Scaling up the nearby wall of an alley, Killua reached the roof of the building and looked down from a bird's eye view. Nothing showed up that would help in his search, and his anxiety steadily grew. Instead the silver haired Zoldyck took out his phone, pinning in Gon's number and phoning him. He never turned off his phone no matter what happened, so he'd picked up this time!

The phone gradually connected to the other line and as Killua opened his mouth to speak, he stopped, horror written in his expression.

"It's been a while, Kil."

_Illumi. It was Illumi who had Gon's phone._

* * *

**All good chapters eventually come to an end!**

**The finale is starting soon, so make sure you have your popcorn at the ready for the next two or three chapters. :)**

**I had originally set for this story to finish at 8 chapters, but that plan expanded and I ended up doing more than I bargained for. Still, I look forward to finishing this story to the best of my abilities. See ya next time!**


	10. Transmuter Truce

He was utterly hysterical.

No more than ten minutes ago he was laughing whole-heartedly with his friend by his side.

That time however regrettably ended and was exchanged by the impassive voice of a terrifying individual he called his older brother. His smooth, inexpressive tone made him silently shudder, a hitch in his breath indicated he feared the worst for his friend's well-being.

"I-Illumi. Where's Gon..?" Killua asked with extreme hesitance displayed in his speech.

It was likely he wouldn't receive the answer he desired, but anything – even a small hint was enough to give him some kind of suggestion that Gon was alright. He had assisted him through so many discomforts and much sadness in the past month, only a failure of a friend would turn their back on him now. This boy was no such person, and he would do whatever it took to find Gon even if the repercussions tore the very flesh from his body. But could it have been Illumi who took away his friend from him? Maybe he was thinking too deeply into this matter… no! No that wouldn't explain why Illumi answered Gon's phone instead of the naïve child himself.

After a minute of agonizing silence, the voice on the other line spoke up, "Ah. He's asleep now."

It appeared he had been doing something before answering, which rose Killua's building anxiety. A bead of nervous sweat ran down his chilled pale skin, and he clutched the phone in his hand tight to the point he could have shattered it with just a little more added strength.

"Please… don't hurt him..." The middle child murmured without pride.

"What was that?"

"I said don't hurt him! _Please_, Illumi!" Killua desperately raised his voice into the phone.

_Pathetic._ Outright pathetic. That was the only description that could label the former assassin now. Once again the line went quiet and it left Killua wishing for a response from his dear brother. The one time he required more than anything to hear from him was now, to know that he couldn't dare harm a hair on Gon's head. The longer he waited, the more he panicked. It was a one-sided waiting game he was clearly losing, with Illumi rising as the evident victor.

It was happening all over again. His pessimistic thoughts, his deep paranoia that eventually turned into delusions of nightmares come to life. Did his older brother enjoy this? Did his mother put him up to it to finally bring him back home after all this time? That couldn't have been it, could it? All he knew at this point was that if his friend ended up dead…he was going to go insane. He couldn't handle the mental stress on his clearly unstable mind, and he couldn't begin to think of the consequences of his sanity snapping like a twig under someone's foot - A sudden realization hit Killua like a brick, and he froze on the spot. Azure eyes widened, and a cuss escaped his throat.

Is that what Hisoka had meant in their discussion?

That 'shine' he spoke of. That glint in his eye showing his general resolve, his will to go on, his mentality and all that was his entire being. He had said 'it's not quite there yet', signifying that his worries had not been erased, but merely lurked at the back of his mind away from the magnificent poise that was Gon Freecss. His fears had not been extinguished; his delusions were not defeated, but momentarily held back by the presence of his best friend.

Now that he was gone… He was breaking. Shattering from the inside out, and releasing a side of himself he wanted to forget and move on from.

'_No! I'm not an assassin… I'm not a killer.' _

Killua shook his head, and found Illumi had yet to answer. The line between callers had not been cut off, but the dead silences made him second guess himself. A quiet rustle in the background of the call caught his attention, and he stood his ground when Illumi began speaking again. So he had intended to continue the conversation between them… good. He couldn't afford to lose connection at this time. But what he said next made Killua regret wanting his answer.

"Kil." He used his nickname in a sickeningly emotionless – yet slightly disappointed tone.

"He's corrupted you."

The words were like venom, and Killua had no defence against them.

"He's made you weak."

They lashed at him like a nine-tailed whip and stole his conscience away.

"If you want him back, then kill me."

…He couldn't do it.

"I'll text you where I am, Kil. But only come if you know you can kill me." Illumi paused.

"**If you don't, then I'll kill Gon. If you run, I'll kill Gon. **_**If you **__**can't **__**kill me, I'll kill Gon."**_

The call ended and Killua had never been so terrified. A quivering breath escaped his open mouth, and his arms went limp beside him with his phone still in hand. Not only was he scared, but he was trembling with unfathomable, _boiling_ _anger. _

A mixture of emotions swelled inside him, and Killua bit his lip hard enough it began to bleed. He had to save Gon, but he couldn't kill his brother. But if he didn't come to the location, then his best friend would die. All because of him... Fear and anger were not a mix that could be handled lightly, and Killlua's breath had become ragged in his rage unknowingly to him. The young boy's form trembled as his thoughts flooded with distrustful ideas that he would be defeated, and Gon would cease to exist. The thoughts continued to break his sanity into pieces like before, and he delved into an endless void of his own.

His brother whispered into his ears, those swirling vortexes in his eyes put him into an unmoving trance. For him to save his friend, he had to once again kill. To become what he no longer wanted to be. An assassin – a killing machine _– A true Zoldyck-_

"Boy, if you keep hissing like that you'll scare everyone around you~"

The dark world around Killua melted, and his eyes turned to see the red-head magician standing by the corner of the building roof he stood on. His arms were folded calmly across his chest, and an amused grin spread eye to eye. How long had he been standing there, watching him? Killua had been so caught up in his inner struggle he had not once noticed Hisoka's aura beaming behind him. He didn't even need to use _Zetsu_ to conceal it. But it was then that Killua noticed his aura was leaking with blood-thirst and within moments, he had contained himself. Sluggishly, Killua swallowed nervously. Was he here to kill him?

"Don't look at me like that…" The joker licked his lips seductively, and tread towards the child in a tranquil manner. "You'll get me excited, little fruit."

With every step he took, Killua mirrored his actions and ventured back. His retreat only appeared to stimulate Hisoka, and eventually he reached the edge of the roof. When he turned his head to see the street below, he noticed then that he was cornered, the red head standing in front of him with a hand stretched out.

"My card." He hummed, "I take it you got my message, but a little too late it appears."

Despite the critical situation, his ever pleasant tone persisted, as if not a worry escaped him and he had every bit of knowledge the day would end well on his part. He was like his brother, but in ways different as well. It made him shake with a strike of anger, but he had to calm himself. The voices in his mind echoed once again, and he had no power to defeat them, but merely try to sweep them out of his thoughts for now.

They urged him; screamed at him to attack, to kill and become who he was meant to be, but no. He would not fall… he couldn't. He wasn't…

A spike of aura hit Killua's walls, and he snapped out of it again. It had belonged to Hisoka, and he had every intension to do it again if necessary. "My card, boy." He repeated, narrowing his golden eyes on Killua's own blue orbs.

Drops of cold sweat ran down his back as Killua took the card out from his pocket and handed it back to Hisoka. He flicked his wrist and the object was gone from his sight, a delightful hum escaping his throat as a result. From the fashion Hisoka stood in, Killua could conclude that he had no impulse to attack or at most slaughter him, but was here for other worldly reasons unknown to him. He didn't have time though to focus on this creep. He had to go and save Gon from Illumi… Who knew how much time he had been given to take action before his friend was crushed by his other brother's hands. All he had was a location when his phone beeped with an incoming message from Gon's phone- or rather from Illumi.

A light hearted chuckle resonated in front of him, and Killua looked up at Hisoka who appeared to be scrutinizing him. He knew exactly what he was thinking just from that coy expression on his face.

"You don't have much time." The magician purred.

There was a small twitch under his eye when he heard that, "…Are you a part of this?"

"No," he answered with a hint of seriousness, "Had I known, I would have stopped Illumi myself. He's so brutal…"

"W-What?"

Hisoka and Illumi were friends – or comrades at least, right? After the adventure to Kukuroo mountain, Gon had informed Killua that his brother and Hisoka knew each other. Gon was his enemy, so why would he have stopped his brother from taking him then? Unless the reason behind it had to do with the Joker's strange fixation on the two children. Was that it? Would he risk making an enemy out of Illumi for that sole dedication to watch them grow and unlock their full potential?

Knowing his confusion, Hisoka's grin extended further. "Nothing. Now then…" He placed a thin hand on his hip, as if waiting for Killua to do something. But the child didn't follow and raised a white brow.

"Are you going to stand there all day?" The older Transmuter added, a jovial raise of aura surrounded around him as his excitement began to escalate like before. From the way he stood, the way his body called out in ecstasy.

Killua rapidly comprehended however what he had been denoting. But not at all had he been expecting it from him.

To join with Hisoka… and fight his brother.

* * *

**Oh my gooodddddd.**

**I did not do well with writing that and I sincerely apologise for my mistakes and bad construction of sentences. But looking past that, I'll see you in the next chapter!**

**Reviews are welcomed and would really motivate me to continue! **


	11. Fight or Flight

'_I can't beat him...'_

Painful jolts of electricity wisped through the air towards his opponent.

'_I can't…'_

His body tumbled along the ground and hit the wall with a large impact.

'_But if I don't…'_

Blood dripped from his thin lips as he broke out with raucous coughs.

'_Gon will die!'_

* * *

A pair of narrowed blue eyes had been staring at the phone's screen for what seemed an eternity. The message was short, but every word was critical in its meaning. He promised a text, and that's exactly what he received. Still… a piece of it deeply disturbed the young boy's moral integrity.

' _16:00 hours_

_Abandoned Sea Tidia Hotel – Northside of city_

_10th Floor - Room 103_

_With love – Illumi '_

…How in the hell was this considered love, dammit?!

The young Transmuter closed his phone with an angered sigh, and turned to his short-term companion whom pleasantly entertained himself by building a tower with cards. They had preferred to occupy themselves at a neighboring café until the time Illumi sent the text, and now that it had been acknowledged on their end, they had to act within the time limit given. Should they fail… well, they knew the severe consequences. Hisoka for one was not worried. He inwardly knew that it would all work out – after all luck was usually in his favour. But Killua was nervous, stressing so far that he constantly tapped his foot against the ground, albeit his steps were quiet, soundless even.

Despite the truce made between them, Killua had his doubts on the magician. Like him, Hisoka was a liar and most definitely could not be trusted under any circumstance. Because of those misgivings, his guard was permanently active in the time they even sat nearby one another. But it was all for Gon that he was willing to join with the enemy in order to save him.

"Let's go." Killua called out to the red head as he stood from his seat.

In response the other grinned, and flicked one of the cards acting as a support for the rest of the tower. His work fell into nothing, as he quietly gathered the cards together in a heap, organization them accordingly.

How could he act so smug at a time like that? Did he not feel anxiety or sorrow? Did he even feel pain?

A crack of thunder rumbled through the atmosphere, forcing many individuals to stop and look up towards the sky and examine the thrashing climate. The peace had ended and once again the rain poured down onto the city in an infinite bellow of wretchedness. Warming rays of light were extinguished, and the shadows returned in the cover of the gloomy clouds from above. Water pelted everything it touched, but was inconsequentially overlooked by the two individuals steadily making their way to the north side of the city.

It had been called a miracle that Killua's broken arm healed in only 8 days, but now he saw it as a sign. He had to make use of his body at full strength, to defeat his brother yet without killing him. He had no strategy, no idea of what Illumi was capable of. But he knew that one way or another he would save Gon. Did Hisoka feel the same way?

In fact, what was going through that man's head at the time?

Upon their arrival at the abandoned Sea Tidia Hotel, they took an instant to review the structure they were about to enter. The architecture was tall for sure, possibly heightened with fifty floors overall but nothing compared to Heavens Arena. It had been ruined over time with missing or broken windows lining the exterior, and paint had been severely scraped off to the point the building was merely grey with tints of sky blue. The official sign saying 'Sea Tidia Hotel' was damaged, barely supporting itself above the front doors.

Hisoka tilted his head in question to the location, but did not voice his opinion. Instead he walked up behind Killua and gently pushed him forward with his hand on his back to get him moving. The trace jolted the young Zoldyck, and he griped under his breath while approaching the entrance doors that had been sloppily boarded up by the previous owners. If they were lodged up however, then how had Illumi gotten in beforehand?

Killua shook the useless thoughts away and mentally prepared himself for what was to come. He only sincerely hoped he could do this….

As they reached the tenth floor, it was only a matter of time before they found the room appointed to them by Illumi. The doors had all been torn from their hinges making it quite easy to enter without causing destruction.

But when Killua looked back to Hisoka, the magician was no longer following him, or anywhere within sight. His aura had completely disappeared from the face of the Earth, and a muttering curse escaped the Hunter. Did he just leave him like that to face his brother alone? It didn't surprise him… The bastard couldn't be trusted. But it's not like he needed his help at all. He had come here to fight Illumi by himself in the first place. Although that promise to himself was easier made than fulfilling.

"You came, Kil." A smooth, transcending voice came from down the corridor.

The Zoldyck's guard rose and he grit his teeth, now in the presence of his older brother Illumi.

"To be honest, I wasn't sure if you would show up." The thin figure stood in the middle of the hall, his head gently tilted to the side. But as he stepped forward, he straightened up and widened his dark eyes. His long black hair swayed mildly behind him, and Killua noticed a faint bruise on his brother's cheek. Gon must have put up a fight before he came… that was very like him, but now he had nothing to worry about. Except, a small inkling nerve hit him inside as his own worry for Gon's condition came to the surface. Illumi couldn't tolerate thrashing victims due to his surprising impatience, therefore Killua was afraid he'd badly wounded his friend.

No, he had to keep from thinking like that. Any form of doubt in his mind would only slow him down-

"Kil." His brother's voice called out to him calmly, and shook him from his contemplations.

"Since you've come here, does that mean you're ready to kill me?"

"I…" Indeed he had come here to save Gon, but he couldn't kill his brother. "I don't want…" The words wouldn't come out, as if there was a barrier blocking their escape. By the way he had begun to hesitate Illumi could tell what he was thinking and stepped towards him, very slowly closing the gap between the Zoldyck brothers. The steps were soundless, but by that lingering silence it was more terrifying to the former assassin than anything else.

As he approached Killua, his _Nen_ steadily began to grow in menace. It emerged and towered over his entire being in the blink of an eye and forced the boy to step back. Even after he brought up his own aura, he felt it was no match against Illumi's more experienced abilities. Step after step, breath after breath, his frightening atmosphere made the other retreat to the end of the hall where he no longer had any room to move futher. He was stuck between a rock and a hard place, and it didn't come to mind that he could make an exit of his own by breaking down the wall.

However, Illumi had enough of this and charged at him in a flash of speed and endurance. In a matter of seconds he stood before Killua and threw a hardened blow his way. It connected with the child's face, and sent him flying into the wall nearby with a loud gasp as his breath was knocked out of his lungs. The dust from the rotting walls covered him and made him cough, but he quickly regained his composure and stood up, albeit with a slight difficulty. It stung more than a normal punch, but he could bear with the pain thankfully.

Illumi chose that he had given him enough time to recover, and Killua was met with an onslaught of raw powered attacks from his brother. His punches were relentlessly fast and he could barely keep up, but he had finally managed to throw his arms up in defence and dodge blow after blow. He couldn't keep it up forever though, due to his brother's sheer overwhelming muscle. He had years of experience, more so than him. At his level there was no possible way to defeat Illumi like that, even with the knowledge of _Nen_. For now he dodged his attacks, but appeared so focused on his front he didn't see the incoming kick from Illumi. It linked with his gut this time, and he felt his innards get crushed from the impact, forcing blood through his system to exit from his mouth as a loud grunt of pain escaped him.

The silver haired boy hit the wall once again, and slid down where he uneventfully met the ground. His insides screamed for him to stop moving, but by his will power, he slowly stood up once more. Illumi calmly walked into the room the hunter had been thrown into and loitered by the doorway to block his only exit.

"Dammit..!" Killua cursed under his breath, clenching his fists in anger at his own weakness. He had to deal with him in order to reach Gon, he knew this… but it didn't make it any easier. As he wiped a dribble of blood from his mouth with his sleeve, he went back into his fighting stance. However this time… he wouldn't be fighting with mere strength and stamina. He would need more than that to fight his brother.

He would need to use his newfound talents of _Nen_.

* * *

His eyes felt heavy as if gravity pushed down on him.

The air was dense, filled with age old dust that drifted in every corner of the abandoned complex. His mind swam with blurred ideas and memories of recent events, and fatigue coursed through his body. He had neither power nor energy to move. It wasn't any type of poison he knew of, in fact it wasn't a poison at all that constricted his movement. But it was similar in that aspect of use.

His body lay flat against the ground face down with his head turned to the side. He could do no more than blink and move his mouth, but it was enough for him to take in his surroundings. An empty room devoid of any noise, completely unfurnished, effortlessly breaking down under the slightest pressure. The windows had been broken from the outside with possible blunt force – most likely with rocks thrown up from bratty children, but this was no doubt a place normal individuals wouldn't venture to.

"…He's…not a killer." The words strained to slip from his mouth.

Hazelnut eyes stared into an abyss of distortion, and the very sight made him feel sicker than he did already. He clenched his teeth together, infuriated with his incapability to fix his current situation.

But now that he was more awake, he could feel the sting of a sharp object in the back of his neck. It had the feeling of a needle, but thicker. It stuck through his skin inch deep and paralysed him through his pressure points. After their meeting he had managed to hit Illumi directly in the face, but briefly after the connected attack he disappeared. It was then that his memory blanked out and he awoke on the ground with no feeling throughout his whole frame.

"Killua…" Gon whispered, "Killua is…my friend." He chanted the words as they ran through his mind.

"…And…he won't be defeated…by the likes of him."

* * *

**I haven't proof-read this chapter but I wanted to get it up as soon as possible. **

**There's more fighting to come! I wonder where Hisoka went before Illumi showed up... hmm... ****See you next chapter!**

**Reviews are more than welcome. They really help motivate me to write! :D**


	12. Boiling Fury

Beat after beat, it continues to pulse. Hearts are likely the most complicated organ to understand in the human body. It's unpredictable to all which try to comprehend its functions, yet it sustains mortal life despite its failures. It is the harbourer of our soul, our feelings, and our courage.

Courage… how long does it last?

His breaths had become ragged and hard, his eyes trained on the undefeated enemy before him. Beads of sweat ran down his skin as he recollected his stance and slowly reassured his mind. He'd taken far too many hits, and as a result his body's movement was beginning to waver. If he continued to drag it out, he'd lose, and all hope of saving him would be naught. He couldn't allow that to happen no matter what. He was going to win; he couldn't run away, he couldn't keep dodging. He had to face him head on and attack.

Illumi had wasted no energy in his attacks, and remained completely apathetic in their battle. He tilted his head every so often to see if he had crushed his little brother more so than prearranged, but every time he stood back up. That spark of determination to save Gon had only grown stronger since he saw him, and now that it was dangerously high he counted it as a threat. Illumi would need to destroy all hope of Killua saving his friend. That was his mission, and he would see it through to the end – even if the result had his little brother loathing him for the rest of his miserable life, even if he wanted to kill him and spill Illumi's blood over every surrounding surface. This was the life of an assassin.

In that moment, the air shifted towards Killua. Illumi noticed the brief alteration in the atmosphere and silently pondered what his younger brother could have been planning. He recognized the Hunter could use _Nen_ from his perceptibly strong aura, but what more had he learnt in the time he'd left Killua to his own accord? It was time to find out…

Jolts of energy began to wisp about Killua's body, and the air gradually became hostilely sharp with illuminating blue. It staggered, reached and extracted repeated through the atmosphere as currents of inhumanely strong electricity leaping around the Zoldyck's own form. His hair softly moved with the currents as they surrounded him, and he opened his eyes to stare at his brother. _Nen_ transformed into electricity, and Illumi finally understood Killua's power. He was a transmuter just like their father and grandfather, and deep down this gave the eldest more reason to turn him into the perfect assassin. He was destined for great power in the family and he would make it so.

Illumi's eyes slowly widened, and a prolonged sound of grandeur escaped his mouth. He was delightfully impressed, but from the indistinguishable poker face he held, it was hard to realise. "You took advantage of your training and turned your power into that of electricity, an element that your body can handle. I'm impressed, Kil." Evidently his tone was still undeniable emotionless, but Killua knew he spoke the truth in those words.

"Mother will be proud when she finds out." He added, noticing a hesitant twitch from Killua's eye.

The sparks flew off his pale skin, and whenever Illumi thought of stepping closer it threw itself in his direction to keep the assassin from moving anywhere. This was going to be a pain, but like Killua, Illumi could bear with electricity. To what extent however was unknown to the younger Zoldyck.

"But until I return, I need to make sure you are no longer corrupted by that prying child."

"_After you fail, I'm going to kill Gon."_

Those words were the trigger to his switch.

Thunderous assaults of bolted electricity aimed at Illumi and destroyed the floor at his feet, forcing him to jump into the air and dodge to the side with ease. However in mere seconds it was hot on his trail and coming at full force to his side. At the very touch the power destroyed the walls and roof, breaking it with ease and leaving nothing but tracks of destruction behind. Rubble disintegrated and wood flew from the ground by the force hitting it.

Unfathomable anger ran through his veins, and by each moment passing his aura grew stronger to the point he could no longer control it subconsciously. It leaked from his body, and with it his abilities shockingly levelled up until it enclosed the whole complex. His body stood still, his eyes fuelled by unmeasured rage. That beautiful sapphire was now a dark swirl of rough ocean blue, covered in shadow by his outrageous blood thirst.

He would_ not_ allow Gon to die.

Blue lightning crashed through the maintained windows with a loud clatter, and the smell of burnt material filled the air as the sparks of Killua's power scorched all that it came in contact with. Illumi dodged out of the way from another attack, and found the gaseous air from the burning structure become a hindrance to his senses. With slight annoyance, the male narrowly avoided a large spark of energy heading his way. In seconds, he disappeared from sight as the scale of electricity hit the wall behind and utterly destroyed it. It was remarkable what Killua had accomplished by channelling his fury.

As Illumi disappeared, Killua widened his eyes and looked around the room to find it empty – and completely ruined. It was barely supporting itself from the ground up to the roof, and a mere step made the entire apartment unstable.

"Gon-!" He instantly thought of his friend and leaped across the room out into the hall. The room behind him collapsed to the ninth level below, but he ignored the crashing and ran to his friend's location. Something crossed his vision midway and the silver haired boy skid across the ground to a halt. Where had that suddenly come from? As he tried to find the source, Killua felt a stream of warm liquid run down his cheek, followed by a light sting of pain. Killua turned his head and saw four large golden needles speedily heading his way, but recognized he wasn't fast enough to evade them.

They wouldn't have been fatal, but due to their ability to change bodily structure it would have been agonizing to deal with. Something however… had dragged Killua backwards against his will, and he found himself hitting the ground as the needles missed and impaled the wall alongside him.

How did he…?

No, that wasn't his instinct that caused his body to move out of the way in time. So what was it?

"Ah~ That was close." A familiar voice purred behind the young boy.

Impulsively Killua rotated and saw the slim figure of the man who had betrayed him. He stood proudly at the end of the hall with a waving hand and a shit-eating grin to follow. Hisoka, that bastard… but did he really save him from getting hit by Illumi's needles? He didn't even feel him-

'_Wait… he couldn't have!'_

A spiral of _Nen_ surfaced and covered Killua's eyes, revealing a pink aura shaped like thread leading from his back to Hisoka's right index finger. _Bungee Gum. _When did that clown attach it to his back?

* * *

_Hisoka tilted his head in question to the location, but did not voice his opinion._

_Instead he walked up behind Killua and gently pushed him forward with his hand on his back to get him moving. The trace jolted the young Zoldyck, and he griped under his breath while approaching the entrance doors that had been sloppily boarded up by the previous owners_

* * *

Back at the time they arrived! Killua grit his teeth at the memory, however he couldn't scold Hisoka for his trickery. In fact he should have been thanking the magician for saving him the pain that could have been inflicted.

Hisoka kept his distance, and shifted his gaze to the long haired male exiting the room which the needles came out of prior to Killua's rescue. There was no hiding his presence now that he'd been discovered, but this knowledge didn't seem to deter the sadist. In fact his grin inhumanely spread when a low chuckle erupted from his sly lips. He'd done his part as promised, and until the end he would no longer interfere. After all he didn't want to get on Illumi's bad side – or rather stay on it too long. It would be bothersome with future plans between the two of them. Killua understood this by the fashion Hisoka started to back away and serenely put his weight against the wall behind him.

"Oh, continue." The red-head mused with desire.

Illumi didn't appear happy by his wish and his dark orbs narrowed into an unrecognizable glare. Although to others his expression seemed unchanged. Gold met black, and their eyes locked into a solid death match.

Killua didn't take any moment for granted and regained his footing as a twist of electricity spiralled around his arms to show his offensive measures coming to light. He bounded forth to Illumi and threw his palms closely together as currents surrounded the outstretched limbs, _'Lightning Palm'. _He was inches away from hitting Illumi in the abdomen before he jumped back to avoid it. He'd missed him but not by much, resulting in various streaks lashing out and hitting Illumi where Killua had directed his attack. It didn't appear to hurt him badly, but it kept him from moving too far.

A disappointed rumble echoed from the young boy, and he ran towards his enemy in another attempt to disable his movement. However his chances had run out, and the assassin mirrored Killua's attack with excessive speed and kicked him square in the stomach. The power administered in his strike held force brutal enough that it swept him across the ground, tumbling into a wall.

Killua knew that at least one or two of his ribs had been crushed from the impact. He rolled over and managed to get up on his hands and knees, coughing up spots of blood that managed to make its way through his system. The maroon liquid glistened in front of him, and his head swam with incoherency from its collision with the wall. Quickly the boy shook his head and looked up to see his brother standing in front of him, but wasn't given any time to act when Illumi grabbed him by his collar.

He picked the silver haired child up and threw him coldly against the wall, further abolishing it with his raw power, but he didn't finish there. He held him in place, black eyes looming over his figure.

"Kil. Where did that strength go?"

"L-Let go of me!" Killua yelled at the other. His voice caught in his throat when Illumi's grip moved up to his esophagus, and slowly began to strangulate him. No words could escape the boy, except a strangled grunt of reinforced obstinacy. Pale hands reached up to grab hold of his brother's and move them away by force, but to no avail did he have the strength to surpass Illumi's. The grip tightened and he gasped with little air he had left. He knew Illumi wouldn't kill him, but that didn't mean he wouldn't make him suffer to hell and back.

Illumi pressed forward with his questions, his face close to Killua's, "What made you so angry before?"

"Shut up!" He shouted in refusal, pouring out all his strength. He had always respected his brother, but by no means would he when he threatened his friend.

"Was it Gon?"

"I said shut up!"

"If I kill him, what will you do?"

Silence followed throughout the hall, all except Killua's quiet struggle to be released.

The inquiry clogged Killua's already questioning thoughts, and he opened his eyes to stare into Illumi's reflective orbs. They knew deep down the young hunter would be lost without his friend, though neither admitted it in the form of words. A brief look of sorrow covered the younger Zoldyck's face, and he dropped his head down in defeat. If Gon died, he would have nowhere to go further in his journey; nowhere but home on Kukuroo Mountain.

His body crumbled to the ground when Illumi let go and stepped away from him. He gasped for air, barely able to hold himself up with the support of his shaking arms. When he'd lost it in his fury, Killua used up so much of his power it left him exhausted with hardly enough energy to perform '_Thunderbolt'. _He had recklessly used up his abilities and it left him on the ground with no defence against Illumi. Is this how it would end? He'd lose and Gon would die. Because he was weak… he couldn't kill his brother and save him.

He wanted to run… to flee in the face of a stronger being than himself. There's no possible way for him to defeat his brother, so what more could he do now? He can't save Gon at this rate! Maybe he shouldn't have come… there's no use… but…but what more could he do?

"Dammit…" Killua's voice wavered and he stared distastefully at the ground. "Dammit…dammit…!"

Is this all he could really do in the end?

Is that all?

Is he…really that weak?

'_The Killua I know wouldn't run from me and make excuses.'_

Gon's words slowly began to echo in his head. They were so sincere…

'_The Killua I know wouldn't lie to me!'_

His emotions at the time, his words, and the look in his eyes; everything about Gon blinded him in a warm, honest light.

'_He'd trust me with his life when we fight against really strong enemies! He is my best friend in the world and I would fight for him no matter what!' _

That's what he said back then…Killua is… his own person.

He is headstrong, quick thinking and most of all an honest, caring friend to Gon Freecss.

Even if he wasn't there, Killua felt as if his friend's hand was lying on his shoulder, urging him to continue fighting. He believed in him when he had no belief in himself. When all of his light had faded away, Gon shared his own. He had always been there for him… his best friend in the whole world. The one person… he would absolutely not let down, no matter who or what he was up against.

If Gon was there, he would fight for him when he was down. He would wait until he could get back up, using his own body as a shield until he could stand on his own two feet. That's the kind of fool Gon was, but he was the one who had dragged Killua out of the darkness many times – the boy who had saved him.

Killua smiled genuinely at his thoughts.

Like Gon had saved him so many times… it was time he saved him.

* * *

**Turns out I might end up making this a little longer!**

**Jeez I'm bad at organizing chapters aren't I? I should make up for it by ending this at 14 chapters instead of 12! **

**Reviews are welcome! They really help motivate me to finish this! :)**


	13. Running Batteries

Static laced through the air, following the electrical eruptions of renewed power. With the swing of a fist, there was another explosion of bursting electricity that fissured and attacked every object near. He had not only destroyed the hall, but the surroundings rooms with relentless attacks, all except two on the end of the level they occupied in battle. One of the two which held the very person he sought to protect with his life.

The taller figure out of the two was being fiercely pushed back and on the defensive. A shot hit his arm leaving it without feeling, another to his shoulder which rendered his other arm useless. Then to his side, a hit that temporarily blocked the muscle movement to his left leg. By each moment, he was losing pieces of himself to move around, and soon he would be entirely paralysed, unable to move or fight back. It did not worry the older brother though. He would not use his abilities in a fight like this between himself and Killua unless ordered.

He was merely told to observe what Killua had learnt.

Killua pushed forward with his attacks, hands balled into tight fists as electricity sparked around them and up his arms. It flowed through his body like a circuit, and he could feel his power growing with his hope to defeat Illumi. Minutes passed as he dodged out of the way from critical hits, and by then he had very faintly regained feeling in his upper limbs. He managed to speed through Killua's defence in the instant it fell from his growing cockiness and swerved behind him in a counterattack, firstly bringing his balled fist and punching Killua in the stomach. Killua hunched over with a held back gasp, trying to keep his ground as he was pushed back by force.

The assassin's hand went flat in its movement, and he sternly hit the back of Killua's neck in one swift motion. It wasn't the attack of a normal human, but that of a true killer trying to decapitate his victim. Thankfully he had made it so that he didn't kill the boy. His distorted sight hazed over with specs of white clouding his vision, and in the follow moments he lost his ground and fell to the floor. But the onslaught of his counterattack didn't stop there, when Illumi grabbed both of Killua's static induced arms and pulling them roughly behind his posterior. A tenacious noise fled him as he turned his head, glaring daggers into Illumi's eyes. That wasn't enough to lastingly stop him.

Both of his shoulders suddenly dislocated to move at an easier angle, and swung out of Illumi's powerful grip before cracking and joining back into place. The boy kicked off from the ground and jumped ahead of Illumi to escape his reach. He stopped when there was a large distance between them and lightly panted from his exhaustion caused by Illumi's critical strikes. When he turned to meet his opponent, Illumi was gently tensing his arms to get the feeling back into them.

"Ahh… Kil." He sounded mockingly despite his motionless expression. "I expected you to kill me, not paralyse me."

It was more of a complaint to him than a lecture, aggravating Killua's mood. He wouldn't kill him, but do as much damage possible so that he could save Gon before the end of the day. It felt like an eternity had passed since this begun, but in reality it had been two hours. Electricity flickered dangerously around his hands and threatened to attack, but he held off from striking as Illumi opened his mouth to speak again.

"I can't feel my arms anymore." Illumi tilted his head, black eyes growing wider. "It's a bit troublesome."

Killua remained silent, reluctant to answer him. Conversation would only prolong Gon's rescue, and give Illumi a larger chance of winning. There was a limit to Killua's energy output, and by then it was already running low like a battery. The child knew his stomach had been crushed by Illumi's attacks, and by the severity of his pain many of his ribs weren't looking too well. But this 'game' had been going on too long… Just because he could bear the pain did not mean it didn't hurt like hell.

Just as Killua was about to move there was an interruption. Numerous loud beeps rebounded through the hall. The source pointed to the unknowing assassin, as he took out the Zoldyck communicator and casually flipped it open. Someone from the family had decided to contact him at this time. Was it more than a coincidence? God damn it he did not need his family interrupting right now!

A voice murmured through the line, but Killua couldn't memorize who it originally belonged to. It was deep like his father Silva, but aged like his grandfather Zeno. Then again it could have been his stupid otaku brother Milluki who sounded different due to the connection of the line. No nevermind, he had an annoying voice... Killua knew the Zoldyck communicator was only used when a job had been completed, so what then was the reason behind the call?

"Is that all?" The silence broke with Illumi's inquisitive tone. He calmly placed a numb hand on his hip, turning away from his younger brother with no worry.

In the meantime, the blow to the back of Killua's neck was still heavily affecting how his mind operated. Illumi knew his weak spots after training and watch over him for years; this was one of them. The silver head found himself leaning against the wall for support as his balance was shortly lost in the peace. His arm lay against the wall with his head resting on the limb, ragged breathes exhaling from the young transmuter. Sweat dripped from his chin and the temperature was rising around him. While he had used his transmuter abilities, he had also been repeated absorbing Illumi's powerful hits.

The running adrenaline had died out, and now Killua found himself keeling over as a result. It had pushed him to keep furiously attacking without stop, but now that he had paused it was lashing back at his aching muscles. He bit his lip until it bled, knees shaking to keep him up on two feet. At the time when he'd lost control over his anger, he poured all of his life energy into those strikes, but been so reckless Illumi had managed to effortlessly dodge every hostile attack towards him. He'd done more damage to the hotels tenth level than his own brother, and this knowledge only enraged him further. Though that rage burned with unrestrained flames he had run dry of vitality.

Killua's eyes snapped opened when he felt a rush of wind by him, and watched to see Illumi upright in front of him. He clapped the phone shut, put it away and spoke to the child with a lax exterior.

"I'm done here."

Illumi's hand elevated higher, but Killua found his body incapable of moving anymore. His slender fingers stopped in front of his eyes, lingering, then again moved to his head where they lightly eased on his silver hair. The gesture was highly unexpected, and a pang on edginess settled in Killua's system. What did he mean by that? After a brief period his vision began to clear of any remaining anomalies, and Illumi retracted his hand from his head. He did no more than that, leaving him confused and depleted of energy.

"Go to sleep, Kil. I won't kill Gon anymore." The words did not go unheard; he did not respond with his voice, but grunted under his tone.

Sapphire orbs were concealed by the silver fringe; they were empty, exhausted and extremely heavy. It had not been caused by his growing exhaustion, but by the mere touch of his elder brother's hand. It flipped a switch inside him, and by his command he could feel deep insentience seep through his mind. He didn't want it to end like this though. He hadn't defeated Illumi; he hadn't done what he'd silently promised to Gon. It couldn't end like this! But even so… his body ignored his calls to move and instead he swayed on the spot, barely keeping balance.

"G-Gon…" He was unaware of what he said before everything went black, and his body fell forward into the arms of his brother Illumi. Killua's eyes slipped shut and he fell into a commanded sleep before the older male picked him up.

His cold, yet indifferent stare remained on the transmuter as he turned around to meet face to face with Hisoka. The magician playfully chuckled with his hands on his hips, inspecting the former assassin lying asleep in his pale arms. That portentous smirk revealed he had unvoiced ideas about what to do with Killua, however he kept them to himself… for now. Another time he would do something, but the day was running out and he had been satisfied enough with the fight's conclusion.

"You've been called back?" The red-head foresaw the answer, but asked to clarify it.

Illumi nodded, "I've completed what I was asked."

"..And will you really leave Gon be?" His voice turned into that of venom at the child's name, eyes narrowing viciously. He had already been patient with Illumi messing around with his prey, but he didn't want him touching the boy anymore. He had agreed to keep his distance for the duration of the mission, but after that all would be the same again.

"Of course." Illumi strode towards the room holding Gon. "…Although I am slightly annoyed since he punched me."

A chuckled erupted from the magician, and he followed behind him to the room left untouched by Killua's igniting power. Even though he had little control over his actions at the start, it was enough he had kept Gon from sustaining injury. A true friend indeed… oh how their little bond got him excited. He wanted to watch them ripen at the same time, but then again if he fought and killed Killua he'd get in trouble from Ilumi. How troublesome he made it, but he understood why the boy had to live. That little family of theirs was just as naturally coy as him.

* * *

He could smell blood with his sensitive nose, but whose it was eluded him.

Killua's electrical _Nen_ had become known to him in the unremitting assault of attacks which destroyed the building around him. But what had occurred when they suddenly stopped? Was he okay? Was he hurt too badly? No, he had absolute faith in his friend's abilities. He had nothing to worry about…right?

Gon bit at the inside of his cheek, honest brown eyes filled with hope for the former assassin. He wished he could stand up and go see him, but something in the back of his neck constricted any form of movement from the spikey haired boy. It was more infuriating than anything, because he lacked the power to break whatever had held him there. His determination however had been building to the point his mind worked overtime to send messages throughout his body and get it moving again. He had to move… he had to get up… ! Nothing could keep him down!

Gon's eyes widened when he heard familiar steps coming into the room. His head was turned in the opposite direction, but the sounds were known to him. Illumi and Hisoka.

Where was Killua though?

A shadow towered over his form, and the child looked at them from the corner of his eyes. It wasn't enough though, and he couldn't see who was there. Who was staring at him, knowing he was fully awake at this point?

"Ya, Gon." The eccentric magician greeted with a wave of his hand, the silhouette on the ground mirroring his actions. It was all he could see of the man but he was in no mood for friendly chat. He wanted his friend, not these two—Wait. That smell… Killua? Was he in the room with them? But if so where? The white haired boy didn't walk in there, and he certainly didn't climb in there either. Did that mean he was being carried by Illumi, from the display of Hisoka's freehanded form? He couldn't be sure, but there was no mistake in that smell.

Gon's voice grew deep with anger as he spoke to Illumi, "What did you do to Killua?"

"He's asleep." The assassin replied, gazing down at his sleeping brother. His head lay comfortably against his shoulder, relaxed and free of any problems for the time being. His manipulation over the boy hadn't faltered in their fight. He had altered it so he could defend and battle against him without the repeating urge to run away. Killua had been so overthrown by anger to notice the change in his own head – but that no longer mattered. It would be like it was before this even begun, and he would continue to run away from opponents stronger than him.

The older Zoldyck placed Killua on the ground with his back against the wall, before unnoticeably removing the pin in the back of Gon's neck. It would take considerable amounts of time for the feeling in his limbs to come back, but otherwise there would be no remaining damage to his body.

Hisoka leaned his body against the wall next to the entrance of the room, "This is been an interesting day. Thank you for the entertainment~" Satisfaction laced in his voice with a chuckle following.

It was not long before Hisoka disappeared from sight, leaving Gon, Killua and Illumi in the room together. However the eldest wasn't planning on remaining too long either. He had accomplished his goals and no longer had reason to stay. As he began walking towards the hall, Gon spoke up and forced him to stop.

"…You didn't answer my question right!" Gon raised his voice, speech boiling with resentment.

"_What did you do to Killua!?" _

A quiet rustle of movement echoed through the empty room, signifying Gon had managed to move his body despite the paralysis still affecting him. The idea of it surprised the assassin in truth; however he did not show it. Illumi turned his head to look at Gon, seeing him attempt to get up off the ground and step towards him. He had only managed to get on his knees, before falling back to the ground with a loud knock against the floorboards. He was struggling by the look on his face, though that did not stop him in his tracks. He kept trying, again and again, until he was up on his feet.

From witnessing his actions, Illumi decided to humour the boy with an answer no different to the original. "…I merely instructed him to rest a while."

And like that, he disappeared from sight.

* * *

**Were any of you expecting that to happen? **

**This chapter was longer than I thought it would be, but that's for better than worse - I think. ****Only one more chapter to go! **

**Reviews are welcomed and would really help motivate me to finish this!**


	14. Your Blinding Light (END)

How long has it been since it stopped raining?

It was early dawn, and the distant chirping of the morning birds was the first sound to hit his ears.

The last thing he remembered was fighting against his obviously stronger brother, and then falling into his arms with deep slumber taking over his conscience. The voices of Illumi and Hisoka were a mere blur, but a piece of his memory automatically recorded in his last moments of being awake. But what had occurred after those events? Was his friend safe? Where was he? How much time had passed?

The first shine of sunlight gaped through the window blinds and met his flawless skin. He found his body extremely comfortable, so much so that he had little energy to move out of bed. His body curled into the blankets around him like a cocoon, with his head turned to the side. It was so peaceful, as if the previous day was nothing but a dream in his illogical, sleep-filled thoughts. But then it all came rushing back to him; the reality of what happened. Gon had been taken by his brother, and he fought endlessly to rescue him. But that feeble attempt did not succeed, and he was… was… what happened then?

The Zoldyck's eyes snapped open with a flurry of anxiety and he pushed himself into a sitting position, shouting out the first thing that came to mind. "Gon!"

It took him a moment for his eyes to adjust to the room, and he noticed he was back at the hotel he and Gon had been staying at throughout the running month. The lights were dim due to the timing of the day and the blinds were mostly covering the sun's rays from invading the complex. He didn't recall coming back here with Gon- no, he didn't even remember finding his friend in the first place. Did that mean he was…

"Killua!"

The call of his name averted Killua's attention to the boy sitting next to the bed, staring at his awaken friend with beaming eyes. Gon… he was safe. He couldn't be happier to know his friend was still alive. A sigh of relief escape him, and KIllua slumped in the bed, shutting his eyes as his body relaxed. His wounds had healed over the night, although the critical injuries to his abdomen remained. They would take longer to heal, but he didn't mind waiting; as long as Gon was left untouched, he didn't care what happened to his own body.

Gon tilted his head from his silence, and smiled more as he stood up, "Killua, thank you."

'_Thank you?' _Killua pondered. He opened his eyes and met Gon's, seeing the sincerity in them. _'Why are you thanking me?'_

The transmuter felt his cheeks go red with embarrassment, and he cleared his throat loudly. He only went to that place to save him like Gon had done so many times before. No thanks were necessary at all. In fact he hadn't been expecting it, because it was like a second nature to him. Friends looked after one another, right? He would have done it in a heartbeat; anything to keep him alive so he could find his father, so he could continue traveling with him. Gon was his best friend in the entire world… and no one would take that away from him.

But the lingering truth nagged at him and Killua's expression dimmed. He lowered his gaze to his lap and spoke softly, "Gon I…" he clenched his fists, "I didn't save you though. Illumi beat me and…"

"No."

The silver haired boy blinked in confusion, "What?"

"I said no." That same answer didn't help explain.

Killua leaned forward and narrowed his eyes judgementally towards Gon. "What do you mean no?!" He raised his voice and abruptly poked him in the forehead, forcing his head to lean back. But despite his actions, Gon's expression remained the same. Determined, and with an honest look of gratitude. How could he pull off such a face without feeling embarrassed? He couldn't have meant it that much, because he didn't end up saving him in the end. If all else he failed and should have been ashamed of his incapability's.

"I mean no because you _did_ save me, Killua." Gon exclaimed with ease, smiling once more.

What the hell was he talking about now?

"You came because we're friends. You watched my back when I couldn't do anything…and you risked getting hurt really badly too."

Gon bowed to his friend, "So thank you, Killua!"

It had nothing to do with winning against Illumi in the first place. It was that he came with the purpose of saving Gon, and nothing more. He selflessly risked his own safety just to reach his friend, and by doing that he truly saved him. Killua had overruled his fear of Illumi and fought against him, going against all known odds to find Gon. In the end, they reunited, both alive and mostly unharmed. That is what he meant. Now Killua understood his words. His lips idly curled up into a smile, and he scratched the back of his head while looking away.

"Jeez… You can't do anything without me, moron." He joked.

Gon laughed in response, "Neither can you!"

'_I really can't.' _Killua knew it, but this truth did not worry him anymore. In fact, he thanked Gon for it. _'Without you Gon, I don't know what I'd do anymore.'_

Killua unhurriedly shifted and dangled his feet over the side of the bed, flexing his arm muscles and experimenting how well he had healed over the night. He felt better than he had in a while, far before he had begun undergoing those sleepless nights and secluded times to deal with his inner sufferings. His mind was clear of constant anxiety, and he could think for himself without Illumi's influential words. Gon even noticed the lifted atmosphere around his friend, and couldn't help the large grin spread from cheek to cheek on his face.

Their gazes suddenly met, and Killua spoke up, "How did we get back here after what happened?"

"I carried you."

"What?!" Killua stood up from the bed, "I-Idiot. You didn't need to do that!"

"Why not?" Gon blinked with slight confusion. He didn't see the reason why he shouldn't have. It wouldn't have been pleasant to stay in that abandoned place with Killua unconscious on the ground. He had to move him somewhere more comfortable, and this was exactly the place. The former assassin huffed and crossed his arms.

"It wasn't worth the trouble…" The former assassin sat back down with a pout.

* * *

_At that time yesterday it was pelting down with rain, so if he had left to go back to the hotel they would have been drenched. The realization knocked a subconscious fragment of Killua's memory, and he vividly remembered a moment from last night. His eyes had opened for no longer than a moment before he was asleep, but he saw and heard everything. He felt the warmness of Gon's forest green jacket around his shoulders whilst he carried him through the rain on his back. Gon was soaked to the bone while he had managed to keep Killua somewhat dry and warm._

_It must have been around mid-evening from the blanket of darkness covering the city. Gon's heavy breaths were all he could hear as his head and arms hung over the boy's shoulders. His eyes barely cracked open, but the movement didn't go unnoticed by the other. "Killua?" His voice was quiet but mixed with concern. He didn't have the energy to answer him, and neither his body nor mind could focus on anything around them. He sank deeper into oblivion, and passed out on his back._

* * *

"It was worth it!"

He really was a fool… but a kind, honest, determined, stubborn fool.

And this fool was his best friend.

His light.

* * *

"Leorio!" Gon shouted out to the tall man with a waving hand and a cheerful smile.

He had only arrived to Yorknew City, and his companion stepped out behind him with his hands casually occupied in his pockets, however with an evident smile of his own. They awaited the doctor-in-training to come over, and both seemed ecstatic to see their friend again. But he was running a little late to their reunion, much to Killua's displeasure.

Leorio pushed up his sunglasses, grinning as he swung his briefcase over his shoulder with the posture of a manageable businessman. He lifted his hand and waved at them in greeting. By the looks of it, those kids were no doubt closer than ever.

"We were waiting for you, old man." Killua commented, earning an instant glare from the elder teenager.

"Shut it, brat! I was doing important stuff…" He mumbled, eyes drifting elsewhere before landing on Gon. "Anyway, how are you Gon?"

Gon excitedly answered, "I'm fine, and so is Killua! We've been looking forward to seeing you again."

Even Killua had to agree with him. "Tell us what you've been doing – aside from boring study."

It was as if that terrible event never befell those children.

Leorio didn't know of what happened the following week after he left since treating Killua's broken arm. But by seeing their smiling faces, he could tell it was truly a good ending for them. Whatever happened, he would not pry. Just watching those two inseparable kids gave him renewed hope that it would stay like that a little longer. They were polar opposites; however this fact is what made them friends.

The man fixed up his tie, and answered them with a voice of interest. "Alright."

He had nothing to worry about from the beginning.

After all, these two had gone through so much already.

Nothing could separate them.

'_Because Gon is… my most precious friend.'_

END

* * *

**Well there you have it! I managed to get this done on my birthday thank goodness. **

**I hope you've all enjoyed what this story has had to offer, and although it's sad to finish this, it's been really fun doing it. **

**It's really late at night so it might seem rushed and perhaps slightly out of proportion but I tried! I might do another fanfic showing off Gon and Killua's friendship because it's really just so adorable. XP Not to mention I like messing about with Killua's head more than anything. **

**In the very near future I'm starting another planned HxH fanfic that shows my OC Pasche. If you're interested you'll be able to find it soon enough once I start it. So for now... tata. I sincerely hope you've enjoyed reading this. :)**


	15. Report In (SIDE STORY)

_Kukuroo Mountain – Home of the famous Zoldyck assassins_

A beautiful woman strode elegantly down the halls, a gorgeously noble dress hanging off her with the train following in her footsteps. Her heels clanked against the cold ground, with her duckling hot on her trail. A feminine kimono was worn by the other, but without care for gender confusion. They trailed behind without a second thought in complete silence. Then they came to a stop, someone blocking their intended path. The shadow was familiar, as they stepped out of the darkness to speak, revealing to be Illumi.

A warm smile came to Kikyou's mouth, knowing full well what he had come back for. Every conversation they had about her favourite son made her smile, because she wanted to believe Silva's words that Killua would come back one day, and stay there. She patiently waited for the eldest son to deliver his due report, flashing open her fan and bringing it close to her lips. Kalluto behind her remained silent, with his dwelling thoughts left unknown.

"Kil's gotten stronger. He's progressing very well."

It was like music to her ears, and a charmingly proud hum escaped her. She wanted to see him so badly… see those eyes that threatened her so much last time they saw one another. She wanted him to continue growing, to become the son she always wanted him to be since the day he was born.

A faint twitch erupted from Illumi's arm which caught both Kikyou and Kalluto's attention. Their mother politely tilted her head in question, "He managed to hurt you too."

Illumi nodded and added, "Yes. My whole body has gone numb."

"Kil has conducted a strong electrical force into his body and aura. It's quite destructive."

"A transmuter like his father, and grandfather…" Kikyou clarified.

The single red image on her mask grew bigger with intrigue. The more she found out about his progress… it made her want to leave this instant and find him and smother the boy with affection. She wanted him back home so much… but of course she had to wait. She had to be patient. It aggravated her whenever she thought about it, in turn the laser 'eye' narrowed and grew small with her inward rage. She clapped the fan shut in front of her, the smile lost from her expression.

Illumi's wide eyes looked over at Kalluto who seemed to be avoiding his gaze. He averted his stare to the ground where his feet own feet were, deep in thought about Killua. His journey seemed like fun, with all of that given freedom. But it wasn't his kind of entertainment. He sought something more... although it might be beneficial to go out and look for him. Just with a little 'fun' on the side, that was all.

"You may go."

Kikyou slapped the closed fan on the palm of her other hand, dismissing her son so he could continue on with various other jobs in line for him. Such an obedient boy Illumi was. Void of burdens and very commanding in the family. So much like her, really.

In the blink of an eye, Illumi was gone and Kikyou lowered her head. She was so proud of Killua though…

So proud…

They would torture him until he was _perfect._


End file.
